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elysiansparadise · 5 months ago

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Aspects of Venus in the Composite Chart

🩷Venus conjunct Sun: This relationship has a lot of harmony, mutual respect and affection. There is a romantic vibe in this duo from the beginning that is enhanced by the warmth with which they treat each other. It is very easy for the other to understand their partner and love them as they are. Both have many details with each other and can help them improve their self-esteem, self-concept and self-love. The presence of the other causes joy and a lot of pleasure in you, it seems that you are in tune and have a lot of compatibility. This aspect is an indicator of physical attraction.

🩷Venus conjunct Moon: From the minute one will have this feeling of tenderness towards the other, a desire to care for and love the other in the most sincere and pure way possible. Constant gifts, a strong need for physical contact and feeling close to the other. Ease of putting others in a good mood. You will love the way the other feels and you will feel delighted to know each other's heart. Huge adoration towards each other, they will feel very comfortable with the tender and affectionate side of their partner. This couple has the particularity of showing love and appreciation with all the love languages. They will naturally put a lot of effort into the emotional side of the relationship.

🩷Venus conjunct Mercury: They will love talking to each other, it will be a pleasant experience for both of them, they will notice that communication will flow like no one else. Lots of flirting and ease in expressing the most sentimental sides of the other. They can easily understand each other's way of loving and can share love languages, as well as hobbies or interests. They will feel that this person knows how to make them feel loved and it is likely that they will awaken romantic interest in each other from the beginning. They will always seek to learn more about each other, how to make them feel better and how to improve the relationship. They will put effort into making everything go smoothly.

🩷Venus conjunct Mars: The attraction is very strong from the beginning, you can see the desire and love between them. They are very similar and compatible, they seem to understand each other's romantic and sexual needs very well. This is a passionate relationship, full of desire and love that seems to grow over time. From the beginning they feel the calling to be with each other, even while they are in the process of getting to know each other. Both of them may think that they fell in love very quickly with the other, quickly falling for each other's charms. In the sexual sphere there is an excellent affinity, their encounters are romantic, fiery and pleasant. They understand and share each other's tastes in this area.

🩷Venus conjunct Jupiter: Love, understanding and good humor will abound in this relationship. It is likely that both will please the other a lot even without intending to, they will feel happy and very loved by the other. Their love will grow more and more. They will learn positive lessons from this relationship, they will learn what it is to be loved and to love. Whether we see the relationship from the outside or inside, the love and adoration they feel for each other will be obvious. It seems that they both worship each other, that they admire and feel pure affection for each other.

🩷Venus conjunct Saturn: This is a relationship that promises to be long-lasting, in which there will be a lot of mutual support and a high level of commitment. Both can take the relationship very seriously from the beginning. This relationship may have taken time to come together, whether due to individual or external obstacles. Both of them focus on building a solid and secure foundation, and may be more oriented toward stability and security than excitement and adventure. This relationship will teach them to be more perseverant, responsible, sensible and to take things more seriously. It is likely that there will be problems expressing themselves at first, but it is something that can be worked on over time.

🩷Venus conjunct Uranus: The couple may be fascinated by each other and attracted by each other's quirks or habits and personality. Since they met, the attraction could have been instantaneous, shocking and intense. They both met when they least expected or looked for it. Here we find a couple that is not monotonous and never ceases to surprise the other. Sometimes they may not understand the other, but even on those occasions the love and pleasure will continue. Both members of the couple value their independence and freedom within the relationship and will try to give the other the space they need.

🩷Venus conjunct Neptune: They can feel a deep spiritual connection, they can think that they understand each other perfectly, they intuit the most appropriate way to love the other. There is a deep and intense adoration and idealism towards each other, they are capable of doing a lot for the other without expecting anything in return, a relationship in which both will give a lot of themselves. They will dream a lot about each other and may feel that the other is what they always wanted in a partner. There is strong empathy and compassion among them. They have to be careful not to fall into codependency or idealize others too much.

🩷Venus conjunct Pluto: They awaken in each other fascination, interest, a passionate love that they could hardly have experienced before. There is a need to know each other deeply, a desire to make the other feel as loved as possible by knowing what the other likes. This is a love that goes beyond the superficial and penetrates the depths of the soul. Through your connection with each other, you can both experience an emotional and personal rebirth, leaving old patterns or ideals of love that didn’t feel okay or healthy. This can be a very honest relationship, but private with others, not letting other people get involved or know much about your relationship. A magnetic and strong charm.

🩷Venus trine Moon: Your appreciation for each other will grow quickly, you feel very comfortable with each other's presence and can be quite touchy. Both make the other immediately have happy, friendly and compassionate emotions, they bring out the tender and protective side of the other. Attraction between you is very strong and they would like to make the other feel good and many types of pleasure. Common values regarding relationships and that will increase the possibility of success of this relationship.

🩷Venus trine Mercury: They will love knowing that they will soon see each other to talk. Fun, joy and very pleasant conversations for both. May have common interests, opinions and values. A very similar way of seeing love. Likely to love each other's voices and feel like they could listen to the other talk for hours. From the beginning they may think of each other as a potential partner and think that the other person can be a charming companion.

🩷Venus trine Mars: Their sexual affinity is strong and they can feel very satisfied with each other in this regard. There is a lot of affection, desire and compatibility between you. They feel that they connect very well together and it seems that they automatically know how to satisfy the other. They not only satisfy their sexual needs, but also their emotional ones. The love and affection of the other motivates them and makes them feel more enthusiastic.

🩷Venus trine Jupiter: Both of them finds opportunities to grow and expand both individually and together. Good humor, sweetness, laughter and mutual support. They will be each other's confidants, understanding and compassion will flow. They will live many adventures together and learn a lot with each other by their side. Satisfaction in all aspects of the relationship. They will care and seek the well-being of the other. You can see each other as husband/wife material.

🩷Venus trine Saturn: Both can enjoy a mature, long-lasting relationship, full of affection and stability. They will not hesitate to work together to overcome challenges and maintain long-term happiness and comfort. A committed relationship, full of affection and sweetness in which both will be reliable and trustworthy for the other. They will respect each other and will lovingly show each other that they are more than their insecurities. Support, understanding and deep love.

🩷Venus trine Uranus: Both individuals aspire and constantly work with each other to keep the relationship alive and exciting. A mixture of friendship and love abounds between them. There is a strong sense of trust and freedom within the relationship. They both feel safe and comfortable being themselves, without fear of being judged or restricted. They will always support each other to go after their aspirations and dreams.

🩷Venus trine Neptune: There is a deep unconditional love and total acceptance of the other. The connection between the two has a strong spiritual component, it is even likely that they feel that they already know each other even from the first times. They can communicate intuitively and understand each other without the need for words and have a great emotional affinity. They can share dreams and desires regarding the relationship.

🩷Venus trine Pluto: There is a deep connection between the two filled with a devoted and constant love to an intense and passionate desire for the other. They will never seek to have control over the other, on the contrary, they will encourage the other to have control over their own lives. They will feel completely loved by the other and will not feel bad about showing their true selves. Complete and sincere love. A lot of sexual affinity and understanding of each other's needs in the relationship.

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🩷Venus sextile Moon: They feel sympathy and a lot of comfort with each other, they feel that they will always appreciate each other's emotions without judging or without being superficial. A lot of love and warmth, you will enjoy spending time together and doing things that the other enjoys to understand them better. They may have very similar styles, hobbies and tastes which will increase compatibility. There will be a lot of emotional understanding and they will feel that they can open up.

🩷Venus sextile Mercury: They will feel that it is easy to talk about feelings and love with the other person and there will be the confidence to give their points of view even if the other person does not share them. Talking is something they both love when it comes to each other. Fluid, understandable and very pleasant communication. They like each other's minds and their way of speaking. Ease for solving problems or issues that may arise.

🩷Venus sextile Mars: There is a good balance between affection and passion, which helps keep the relationship dynamic and exciting. Lots of physical attraction and affinity of temperaments. It makes them genuinely happy to hear about each other's plans and progress. They love each other's ambition. They are very demonstrative with each other and will never leave room for doubts. Their love for each other is very noticeable both to them and others.

🩷Venus sextile Jupiter: Both will want to enjoy and share together, they will celebrate each other's victories and happiness. Assets and wealth can be gathered without problem. Both of them will love to spoil each other in every possible way. This relationship makes them feel optimistic, happy and comfortable. They may see an increase in luck in their lives since they met each other. They will look to do little things that always put a smile on each other's faces.

🩷Venus sextile Saturn: Loyalty will be a main element in this relationship. They will respect and honor each other's presence in their lives. The displays of affection will be constant and they will be more open and loving with each other. They will show each other unconditional support, feel deep adoration for each other, and seek to mutually satisfy each other's needs in the relationship. From the beginning they feel that with each other they can aspire to a serious relationship.

🩷Venus sextile Uranus: They both often find unique and creative ways to express their love and affection. They like to experiment and try new things together. Although there is a strong bond between the two, they also respect and value each other's independence. They will always encourage and love each other to grow and develop individually. Both will integrate into each other's routine and bring new things into their lives.

🩷Venus sextile Neptune: They both enjoy magical moments together where they experience genuine love, charm and happiness. Deep empathy and understanding between the two. They care deeply about each other and are very sensitive to each other's needs and feelings. Their fantasies about love become reality with each other. They will seek to help each other and be together through thick and thin. Devotion and fascination for the other.

🩷Venus sextile Pluto: They empower each other, and are of great support to each other in their personal transformations. They will do their part to develop a strong and resilient relationship. Attraction, a desire to know each other deeply and loyalty towards the other. Both love each other intensely and strongly, many times it is likely that they have been interested or in love with each other for a long time before starting a relationship.

🩷Venus opposition Sun: You can fall into the trope of opposites attract, there will be great magnetism between you and despite the differences things can progress smoothly. From the beginning there was a romantic attitude towards each other, but most likely due to the nature of the aspect there was shyness involved. Both will teach each other to be more demonstrative and loving in the relationship.

🩷Venus opposition Moon: You can teach each other new ways of loving that are completely different from what you thought you wanted from a relationship. Strong attraction indicator. They may feel that their emotions and ways of expressing them are very different. You’ll feel more relaxed and carefree with each other.

🩷Venus opposition Mercury: They have very different ways of showing love, as well as expressing their feelings. Despite being very different, there can be a feeling of comfort between the two. They feel like they don't finish getting to know each other. Patience is needed, as they may find it difficult to express their emotions at first. Despite their differences, both will try to get to know each other better. Interested in each other.

🩷Venus opposition Mars: The attraction between the two is undeniable and never goes unnoticed. It is necessary that they learn to value the needs of others. Difference in temperaments. One party may be more defensive than the other. They fall into the archetype of opposites and complementarities. Passionate and intense feelings towards each other.

🩷Venus opposition Jupiter: Both will always seek to maintain good humor and calm with each other. They may have different ideals of love. Fun and a lot of affection between both, they can fall into giving a lot to the other, which can be a problem if there is no balance, since one party may feel that they give more than the other. It is necessary to establish boundaries.

🩷Venus opposition Saturn: Both will be very dedicated to the relationship, since this aspect does not take away the level of commitment and loyalty. However, it is likely that either both of them or one of them have a fear of rejection or insecurities that make them not express their feelings so freely at first. They can be very patient to help the other feel more comfortable.

🩷Venus opposition Uranus: There was an inexplicable and rapid attraction between the two. They may be disconcerted by how quickly the other person caught their attention. They may be very different in their ways of loving, but those differences seem to make them appreciate each other more. Their relationship can bring many changes in your lives and how you see love.

🩷Venus opposition Neptune: They intrigue each other and can't help but feel drawn to each other. It is likely that both are only used to giving, so in this relationship they will also learn to receive. Both will plan and dream a lot about the future of the relationship. They will bring out the sensitive and emotional side of each other. May give a lot for the other.

🩷Venus opposition Pluto: Both will help the other discover that romantic side that they thought was buried or nonexistent. They awaken the most intense passions and the deepest love. Loyalty, intense devotion and a need to be close to each other. Magnetism, attraction and a lot of romantic and sexual affinity. There may be jealousy and the need to be with each other.

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🩷Venus square Moon: Both will get very carried away by the emotions they feel for the other, they can idealize each other. They will have different emotional needs which can cause problems if not discussed. Be aware and avoid that each other's families get too involved in the relationship.

🩷Venus square Mercury: They may have very different tastes, preferences, interests as well as love languages that do not fit with each other. One way to work on this square is to talk about the way they want to be loved and how they usually show love to avoid jumping to conclusions or any type of confusion regarding your feelings.

🩷Venus square Mars: The physical attraction between the two is truly strong, but there can also be conflicts and tensions regarding desires, preferences and needs. Many times a clash of temperaments occurs. In order to work in this square they have to work on having fluid communication where they try to understand the other.

🩷Venus square Jupiter: Difference in values and priorities. Despite this, love is very strong and they are capable of giving a lot for each other, they have a lot of faith in the relationship and can place expectations on it. Adoration and a lot of appreciation, they can find the other attractive and interesting. They may have very different ideals of love and ways of loving.

🩷Venus square Saturn: They may feel that for the relationship to happen they had to go through many obstacles, both internal and external. Long-term relationship. An age difference is possible. Difficulties finding a balance between the need for love and responsibility. They need to work on building a foundation of trust and security.

🩷Venus square Uranus: It's likely that both of you have either been single for a long time, or have trouble opening up to the idea of loving and being loved. It may be new territory for both of you, so you will need some patience. A relationship full of fun, intense emotions and surprises. Establish that in the relationship only the two of you can make decisions. They will not let others intervene.

🩷Venus square Neptune: Although there is adoration and a feeling that this connection is deep and spiritual, try not to put expectations on the other or idealize them. It is important to find a healthy balance between giving and receiving. They may feel a lack of clarity in the relationship, so it is important to work on transparent communication.

🩷Venus square Pluto: It can lead to significant transformation if both are willing to face their issues and work on their personal growth. Jealousy and possessiveness can be noticeable. An intense and inexplicable desire. This relationship will awaken intense desires and deep feelings in both of them that they had never felt. It will be hard to let go of the other.

-> Go back to Composite Chart Masterlist

#venus #composite chart #aspects of venus in the composite chart #composite chart venus #astrology #venus in the composite chart

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the-tarot-witch22 · 5 months ago

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Your relationship dynamic with your future spouse - Pick a pile

Pile 1/ Pile 2/ Pile 3

My Paid Readings | My insta

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Hello everyone ! This is my another pick a pile or pac reading so please be kind and leave comment or reblog, and let me know if it resonated with you!

Note : This is a general reading or collective reading. It may or may not resonate with you. Please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. And it's totally okay if our energies aren't aligned!

How to pick : Take a deep breath and choose a pile which you feel most connected to! You can choose more than one pile, it just means both pile have messages for you!

I worked really hard on this pile please show some love by leaving comments, likes and reblogs!

Pile 1:

(The cards I got for you - 4 of cups, king of wands, 2 of wands and 3 of pentacles)

Okay so the very first thing i felt when i did your reading you would be sharing similar past, like you both might have gone through similar things in your life, some of you might have come from toxic households, parents, ex who were a piece of shit, and your fs had gone through similar things, same heartbreaks or betrayal in their life, and that's how you bond with them, you understand each other, the feelings you have for each other, the dynamic between you both is quite emotional, vulnerable and yet loving, i feel you will see each other, the feelings between you both will flow, i feel they will teach you a lot and so will you, like how not every person is same, how different you both are, but you still blend together, for some of you your future spouse is way more mature than you, they have experienced so many things, they takes relationship very seriously, or intensely, you both will teach other how important is to be happy with what you have to look at the things which will make you both happy you won't both will grow together, i also feel for some of you, your future spouse is your partner crime they support or encourage you in anything you do, the bond you will share with them is quite flowy and smooth. I also channel a scene where he is like let me do it for you type of thing they will also feel they can be just themselves when they are with you, but there also signs they just wanna impress you in whatever thing they do, you will also be on same wavelength physically and emotionally, your dynamic with them is just so sweet, They will definitely treat you the way you deserve to be treated, for some of you , you will both bond with your same interests, like do you know the couples who just travel together, not stopping for anyone, exploring new things new places, you are them, you both will share that interest with each other, there will be also some versatilities in a good way, you might both have difference of opinions but i see you both understanding each other's pov and giving each other things you both deserve and want.

Okay so guys your pile tells me how understanding and sweet your fs is with you, your dynamic is just so easy with them. and you deserve that!

Pile 2:

(The cards I got for you - ace of cups, ace of swords, 2 of pentacles and temperance)

Okay so the very first thing i felt was your dynamic with your future spouse would be very calm and peaceful, very soft and pure, your future spouse will awaken a very new feeling in you give a new meaning to love and life, you both would be very comfortable and relaxed with each other, for some of you i am sensing you could need alone time it could be you or them, but you both will let each other in, that's how meaningful and calming your relationship is, I also feel many people around you could be jealous of you and him, like you relationship, the way you treat each other, the feelings , the person could be very new not someone you already know, their way of thinking will attract you so much to them, their beliefs, their open mindedness, their way of handling anything will melt you, you will understand each other emotions very deeply honestly, almost like telepathically, i channel a scene where you need something and you don't even ask him and he will be there with that very thing, that is honestly so sweet, even i am feeling butterflies, the dynamic would be very soft and safe, like you know you can trust them blindly, he will just be there whenever you need him, present for you, I also feel you will both like indoor dates rather than going out, because you would want to spend time each other than spending it with others, or seeing others, i also heard "you are the only one who matter for me, there is no one, i would be rather be with", okay wow, for some of you guys, you could need reassurance from your other half and he will happily give it to you, i also feel Pisces and Gemini energy here for some of you, or it could be your future spouse, your relationship with each other is so free you won't be tired with each other's presence, okay so that serves as the confirmation with you letting each other in your personal space, i also feel you both would be communicating a lot , communication will definitely have a big role in both of your relationship, i also feel no matter the distance you both would make it through till the end , i also heard "i wanna grow old with you", gosh they are such a softie for you! for some of you could have doubts about your fs intentions but i feel and hear they will be very patient with you, i see a scene where they are busy, but they will reply to your texts, just to let you know they are their for you, you don't have to worry about anything, They will make sure you have their attention, they are quite attentive and thoughtful too, they would also like to do or go to grocery shopping with you, i channel a scene where they are looping an arm around your neck, just like talking or showing you their love, their love language could be physical touch or words of affirmation, the dynamic of your both is very balanced, you will nourish and care for each other a lot.

So pile 2, seems like you guys got the gem, and i can't be more happier <3

Pile 3:

(The cards I got for you - king of pentacles, knight of wands, the star, 10 of swords and queen of wands)

Okay so the very first thing i feel for you guys you guys might have manifested each other in your lives, you guys have wished for them and waited for them so long, but soon the wait is going to be over for you, and they will be coming into your life. I also heard "we are meant to be together", they dynamic between you both is just so happy and loving, you caring for each other's needs, being there for each other in tough times, and supporting each others in lows and high, that's how your both relationship is like, honestly i felt that tingly happy feeling right here for you both, and i love that. For very few of you, you both dynamic is like "tom and jerry", playful and flirty banter, some of you could be manifesting that enemies to lovers trope where they falls first and harder (not for everyone but for few) or it could be like your favourite trope, and i love that!, So for the majority of you the dynamic is like they are your provider financially, emotionally and physically, such an honest vibe i got from them, Like they would definitely let everyone go down for you i keep hearing the song "I'd let the world burn by Chris Grey", so your fs might be telling you how you are their treasure, their precious they won't let anyone hurt you, makes sense why i felt that protector and provider energy from them, their love language could be gift giving and act of services, they will shower you with love and surprises, the dynamic between you both is very healing and intense both mentally and physically, they will be your anchor, like when you feel lost they will hold you tell you how you everything for them, such a sweet couple, i also channel that trope, "bad ass fmc x men who is just obsessed with her" in a good way, you both would be such a power couple together, you both could be each other's divine counter part, your future spouse would be very protective for you, i channel a scene where you just spend his money and he is like, that's my wife, such a book men he is, you both would also share that hot sexual dynamic who just can't keep their hands off each other, he keeps telling me to tell you "when we meet , you will be my ride or die", i will kiss the fu*k outta you, lol they really are something , love that for you, your sexual dynamic is also on same level, you two will be craving each other and intensely, he is also telling me it's very soon, not a lot of wait till you both meet, your dynamic is just very divine and intense, you both will be healing each other's wound, which has been imprinted on you, the dynamic is also very healing, i feel you both would be helping each other grow from past wounds, you guys can also check out pile 1, it could have messages for you, you both will just get each other, for some of you guys, you guys could have been abandoned by their loved ones and it could be your future spouse too, so you will help them and vice versa you guys could be going through lots of transformation right now or have been through them, which has caused and left you very exhausted, but i see your future spouse helping you through everything and you will be helping your future spouse, I also feel you both will see each other, like in a party your future spouse would be the only one who matters, the dynamic between you both is prosperous and full of abundance!

So pile 3 give me a towel, because i am sweating right now with love and intensity, your future spouse wants you to wait and he will be in your life very soon, so happy for you guys~

Thank you for stopping by! Take care and remember you are loved <3

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astrologydayz · 9 months ago

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MOON IN HOUSES - SYNASTRY🩵🦋🔒

MOON IN PARTNERS 1ST HOUSE = house person feels less lonely in this world with the Moon person around🩵. Moon person calms the house person like no other<33 - house person can see the Moon person as their own little safe place/safe heaven. House person knows that they don't have 2 talk a whole lot 2 Moon, cuz the Moon person already knows wassup/knows what the house person is feeling without words being shared. When house person is happy, the Moon person is happy. If house person lays down in the dark, with no hopes of standing 4 a while? The Moon person lays down in the dark with em, until they’re ready🔒. Conflicting aspects can show issues when it comes 2 Moons understanding of the house person/house person not being trusting/sure of the Moon person's intensions.

MOON IN PARTNERS 2ND HOUSE = house person finally feels understood, & appreciated when it comes 2 their material possessions/their values/spending habits/their earnings! Moon can be a very supporting factor for the house person 2 really get up & work! They can be house person's biggest cheerleader!📣 House person feels safe, & understood for what they chase!😻 House person can value/see the Moon person as one of their biggest prizes/possessions! Conflicting aspects can show one feeling like they’re being used 4 financial gain/or used 4 security in life/issues/arguments bc of insecurities.

MOON IN PARTNERS 3RD HOUSE = house person can stay up all night, & talk 2 the Moon person<33 - these two can talk for hoursssss. House person feels so fucking comfortable with sharing anything there's on their mind with the Moon person!😻 Moon person is like house person's own private, & SAFE journal! Moon won't judge them. If something happens?? Moon person is the 1st one 2 know! Moon person could have known house persons siblings beforehand/or just know of them beforehand. Conflicting aspects can show issues with withholding/not sharing how they feel with each other - "not speaking one's mind"/issues with one/or both judging each other. MOON IN PARTNERS 4TH HOUSE = house person feels safe enough with Moon person 2 open up about their childhood/especially childhood issues/trauma❤️‍🩹. House person can feel like the Moon person is their 1st true person - 1st true home in this world💞. Moon person is like a healing source4the house person/healing the inner child of them. These two are really close - the types 2 know everything about each other. House person can be quite protective of the Moon person here. Conflicting aspects can show issues with house person not opening themselves up 100%/arguments, or petty feelings when it comes 2 house persons past/petty arguments between them at home.

MOON IN PARTNERS 5TH HOUSE = the Moon person can inspire the house person 2 create🎨🖌️🎶 - can be them creating music, them painting, art in general - anything creative! Like a muse & their artist! Sex here can be very much full of emotions, & creativity✨. Moon person brings feelings of joy, pleasure, & FUN 2 the house person! House person feels so fucking lucky 2 have the Moon person by their side<33. This placement can love to keep date nights going in their relationship - even when they're 60<33. Conflicting aspects can show creativity being killed/joy, pleasure, & fun getting sucked out/issues bc of awkward moments.

MOON IN PARTNERS 6TH HOUSE = house person can feel like their days are A LOT better with the Moon person around🥳😍. Moon person brings so much joy 2 the house person when it comes 2 doing the most basic daily things together! House person feels very safe, & comfortable with the Moon person around. Moon person can be very thoughtful of the house person - like check in on them a lot 2 see if they need anything, like if they're hungry/thirsty, seriously, whatever they need, Moon can handle it❤️. House person can feel very lucky 2 have found someone who's so thoughtful, & amazing<33. Conflicting aspects can show issues/arguments bc one can feel taken for granted/feel taken advantaged of/issues with the way feelings is shared/showed on a day 2 day basic/problems bc they don't think about each other's daily needs.

MOON IN PARTNERS 7TH HOUSE = the way the Moon person show/voice their feelings is exactly what the house person search 4 for in a stabile/marriage partner<33. House person feels throughly accepted by the Moon person - Moon person also got the house person's back - in private, & with others❤️‍🔥. Moon person can help the house person with feeling things from all sides/especially when it comes 2 feeling/understanding sides they haven’t been understanding of until now - house person gets more accepting of others bc of this😻. Conflicting aspects can show issues bc one is not accepting of the other/"lover 2 enemies"/arguments bc of/or over others.

MOON IN PARTNERS 8TH HOUSE = can show obsessional feelings - house person always thinking about the Moon person, they can't really help themselves. House person can't hide here. No matter how hard they try, the Moon person will see through them. House person feels very attached 2 the Moon person, bc of the intimacy they bring. Sex can be very transformative, & very intense 4 the house person here<33. House person can share anything from how their day was, till one of the worst days of their lives with the Moon person❤️‍🩹 - it's like they can't keep it in - they have almost a need, I would call it for sharing with Moon. Moon can be like their own personal therapist. Conflicting aspects can show jealousy/obsession issues/things being "hidden" from the other/clinginess issues. MOON IN PARTNERS 9TH HOUSE = house person feels really appreciated, & listened 2 here when it comes 2 things they know about higher learning📕, or 2 the things they know about different cultures/countries📚, or when it comes 2 things they believe in/or things they're not really sure about. Moon person can help the house person with figuring things out in life when in doubt, but also while being their support system2! Moon person could also join house person on a lot of their journeys - them experiencing other cultures/countries together - making memories they'll remember 4 life!🥰 Conflicting aspects can show long distance issues”/issues bc of religion - no understanding/putting the other one on a pedestal"/issues bc of a "god complex between them" - "who's right, & who's wrong".

MOON IN PARTNERS 10TH HOUSE = Moon person is house person's true supporter in public/when they're out☝️. Moon person always got house persons back in public - which the house person fucking appreciates, & loves so much about the Moon person💚. Moon can help the house person out a lot with their image/or with how they act/are perceived in/by the public! House person feels really supported by the Moon person 2 keep grinding, & 2 keep chasing their goals!✨ They know they got Moon 2 lean on, if things get a little 2 hard sometimes! Conflicting aspects can show embarrassing moments between them in public/issues bc of ones goals/work/one not being supportive enough/or realistic enough.

MOON IN PARTNERS 11TH HOUSE = house person feels an incredible support by the Moon person 2 chase their dreams in life!💋 Moon can be house person's biggest fan, when it comes 2 whatever they're chasing<33 - Moon person is always the 1st one 2 celebrate a win in house persons life! They can really love hanging out with friends together, or just hang out/go out a lot together where others are around2<33. These two can put their heart, & soul into some of the same causes here in life - they could even have met each other through it<33. Conflicting aspects can show one not being understanding of the other one's socials/dreams, or friends/issues bc of different wants.

MOON IN PARTNERS 12TH HOUSE = Moon, & house person connects in a way that can't really be explained. House person can have very vivid dreams about the Moon person. Moon person knows/sees many of the things the house person wish they could sometimes hide. - But that's all the things the Moon person appreciates the most about the house person tho - "Nobody sees house person more clearly than the Moon person". What the house person sees as imperfections = the Moon person see as perfections😻<33. Conflicting aspects can show issues/misunderstandings bc of feelings not being shared/understood/issues bc of ghosting/issues bc Moon can make house person feel anxious/or uncomfortable.

THANKS4READING BABE!! APPRECIATE U, ALWAYS💜

MASTERLIST

#synastry #moon in houses synastry #astro community #astrology #moon astrology #1st house #astro notes

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its-avalon-08 · 4 months ago

Text

don't walk away from me (ln4)

✦ pairing - lando norris x female!reader

✦ genre - angst, neglect, alot of tears, fluff, it's super long

Y/N sat on the edge of her bed, her heart racing and hands trembling as she stared at the small, white plastic stick in her hand. Two faint pink lines stared back at her, confirming what she had both feared and hoped for. She was pregnant.

Tears welled up in her eyes as a whirlwind of emotions swirled within her—fear, joy, uncertainty. She and Lando had been together for five years, but they had never discussed having children. Not seriously, at least. She had always imagined they would have this conversation when they were both ready, when the timing was perfect. But now, the reality of her situation hit her like a ton of bricks.

She placed the pregnancy test on the nightstand and hugged her knees to her chest, trying to calm herself. The house was eerily quiet, amplifying her anxiety. She glanced at the clock. Lando would be home soon. How was she going to tell him? What if he didn't want this? What if he wasn't ready?

The sound of the front door opening and closing pulled her out of her thoughts. She wiped her tears away and took a deep breath, steeling herself for the conversation ahead.

"Y/N, I'm home," Lando called out from downstairs.

She stood up, her legs feeling shaky, and walked to the top of the stairs. "Lando, can you come up here for a second?"

His footsteps echoed through the house as he made his way up the stairs. When he reached the bedroom door, he gave her a curious look. "What's up?"

Y/N bit her lip, her heart pounding in her chest. "I need to talk to you about something. Something important."

Lando's expression shifted to concern as he walked into the room and closed the door behind him. "Okay, you're scaring me. What's going on?"

She took a deep breath, her voice trembling. "I'm pregnant."

For a moment, there was silence. Lando's eyes widened, and his face went pale. "What? How?"

Y/N's tears started to flow again. "I don't know, Lando. It just happened. I'm scared too, but we need to talk about this."

Lando ran a hand through his hair, pacing back and forth. "This can't be happening right now. I'm not ready for this. We have our whole lives ahead of us, our careers. A baby wasn't part of the plan."

Her heart shattered at his words. "I know it's unexpected, but we can figure it out together. We love each other, don't we? We can make this work."

He stopped pacing and turned to face her, anger and frustration etched on his face. "I don't want a baby right now, Y/N. This isn't what I signed up for. How could you let this happen?"

She flinched at his harsh tone, her tears flowing freely. "It's not like I planned this, Lando. You are equally as responsible as I am. But it's happening, and we need to deal with it. Together."

He shook his head, his voice rising. "No, you need to deal with it. I can't handle this right now. I'm not ready to be a father."

The room was thick with tension, the air heavy with unspoken fears and shattered dreams. Y/N's heart ached as she realized the depth of his feelings. She had hoped for support, for understanding, but instead, she felt more alone than ever.

"Lando, please," she pleaded, her voice breaking. "We can figure this out. We can make it work."

He looked at her with a mix of anger and despair. "I can't, Y/N. I just can't."

With those words, he turned and left the room, the sound of the door slamming echoing through the house. Y/N collapsed onto the bed, her sobs wracking her body. She had never felt so lost, so scared, so heartbroken.

She sat on the edge of the bed, her hands trembling as she tried to compose herself. Lando’s reaction had been worse than she had imagined, and now he stood in front of her, pacing back and forth, his face contorted with frustration and disbelief.

"I thought you would fight for us. For me," she whispered, her voice breaking.

Lando stopped pacing and turned to face her, his eyes filled with a mix of anger and desperation. "Fight for us? Y/N, do you even understand what this means? My career, all of it—derailed! I’ve worked my entire life to get to this point, and now this?"

Tears streamed down her face as she looked up at him, her heart aching with every word he said. "Are you even listening to me, Lando? This isn’t just about you. This is our baby. Our future. You can’t just push this away because it’s inconvenient."

He threw his hands up in exasperation. "Inconvenient? Y/N, it’s more than inconvenient! It’s a complete upheaval of everything we’ve built. Everything I’ve built. How can you expect me to just accept this?"

She stood up, her voice trembling with a mix of anger and sorrow. "Because I love you, Lando! And I thought you loved me too. I thought we were in this together, no matter what."

He shook his head, his eyes filled with tears he refused to let fall. "I do love you, but this… this is too much. I’m not ready to be a father. I’m not ready for any of this."

Y/N took a step closer to him, her eyes pleading. "And you think I am? You think I wanted this to happen right now? But it did, and we have to deal with it. We have to face it together. Isn’t that what love is about?"

Lando’s voice softened, but his words still cut deep. "I’m scared, Y/N. I don’t know if I can do this."

Her heart shattered at the vulnerability in his voice, but she couldn’t let go of the anger and hurt that had built up inside her. "I’m scared too, Lando. But running away isn’t going to solve anything. We have to face this, together."

He looked away, his jaw clenched. "I need time to think. I can’t do this right now."

Y/N felt a surge of anger and desperation. "Time? We don’t have time, Lando. This is happening now, whether we’re ready or not. And I need you to be with me in this. I need you to fight for us."

He took a deep breath, his shoulders sagging with the weight of his emotions. "I don’t know if I can."

Her voice softened, but the pain was still evident. "Please, Lando. Don’t give up on us. Don’t give up on me."

He looked at her, his eyes filled with a mix of love and fear. "I’m sorry, Y/N. I just… I can’t."

With those words, he turned and walked out of the room, leaving Y/N standing there, her heart broken and her world turned upside down. She sank to the floor, her sobs echoing through the empty house.

In that moment, she realized that she was truly alone. She had hoped that their love would be strong enough to overcome any obstacle, but now she faced the harsh reality that sometimes, love wasn’t enough. But even in her despair, she knew she would fight for her baby. She would fight for the future she believed in, with or without Lando.

Because in the end, the love she had for her child was stronger than any fear, stronger than any heartbreak. And she would not let that love be derailed, no matter what.

The reality of her situation settled over her like a heavy blanket. She was pregnant, and the man she loved was not ready to face it with her. She was alone in this, and the path ahead seemed impossibly difficult.

But as she lay there, crying into the pillows, a steely resolve began to form within her. She would do whatever it took to protect and care for her child. She would find a way to make it work, with or without Lando.

a few hours later

Lando stood in the empty living room, the silence around him deafening. His eyes scanned the room, confusion and panic setting in as he noticed the absence of Y/N’s belongings. His heart raced as he hurried up the stairs to their bedroom, only to find it stripped of her presence. The closet doors hung open, her clothes gone, and the drawers emptied.

A notification buzzed on his phone, pulling him out of his frantic thoughts. He glanced at the screen to see a large deposit in his bank account. He froze, realizing what it meant. He rushed back downstairs, where a table was neatly stacked with items—clothes, jewelry, and gifts he had bought for Y/N over the years. Everything was returned, methodically placed as if to signify the end of their relationship.

Lando’s breath caught in his throat. He had never felt so lost, so utterly regretful. His mind raced back to their fight, his harsh words echoing in his ears. He had pushed her away, and now she was gone. Completely.

The doorbell rang, jolting him from his thoughts. He opened the door to find Carlos standing there, his expression a mix of anger and disappointment. Behind him, Rebecca stood with a comforting hand on Carlos’ shoulder.

“What are you doing here?” Lando asked, his voice hollow.

Carlos stepped inside, his eyes blazing. “I’m here because Y/N needs someone to look after her. Clearly, that’s not you anymore.”

Lando’s heart sank. “Carlos, I made a mistake. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”

Carlos’s jaw tightened. “A mistake? Lando, you didn’t just make a mistake. You broke her heart. You left her alone when she needed you the most.”

Lando’s eyes filled with tears. “I know, and I regret it. Please, just let me see her. Let me make things right.”

Carlos shook his head firmly. “No, you don’t get to see her. Not after what you did. She’s devastated, Lando. Do you understand that? She’s completely heartbroken.”

Lando’s voice cracked. “I didn’t know what to do. I was scared.”

Carlos’s anger flared. “And you think she wasn’t? You think she didn’t need you to be strong for her, to stand by her side? You were supposed to be her partner, and you abandoned her.”

Lando buried his face in his hands, his body shaking with sobs. “I know. I know I messed up. But I love her, Carlos. I love her so much.”

Carlos softened slightly but kept his guard up. “Love isn’t just words, Lando. It’s actions. And your actions showed her that she can’t rely on you. That she can’t trust you to be there for her.”

Rebecca stepped forward, her voice gentle yet firm. “Y/N needs time, Lando. She needs to heal. Right now, the best thing you can do is give her space and let her process everything.”

Lando looked up, his eyes pleading. “Please, just tell her I’m sorry. Tell her I love her and that I’ll do anything to make it right.”

Carlos’s gaze softened, but his resolve remained. “She knows, Lando. But it’s going to take more than words to fix this. It’s going to take time and a lot of effort on your part. And right now, the best thing for her is to be surrounded by people who will support her and help her heal.”

Lando nodded, his heart heavy with guilt and regret. “I understand. Please, just take care of her. Tell her I’m here, waiting, whenever she’s ready.”

Carlos and Rebecca turned to leave, but Carlos paused, his face filled with a mix of anger and sorrow. “I thought you would stick around, Lando. I thought you’d be there for her, no matter what. But now, she’s alone because of you.”

Lando felt the weight of Carlos’s words hit him like a punch to the gut. “I never wanted this, Carlos. I never wanted to hurt her.”

Carlos shook his head, his eyes filled with disappointment. “Intentions don’t matter when your actions speak louder. She needed you, and you walked away. Now she’s left to pick up the pieces on her own.”

As the door closed behind them, Lando sank to the floor, his heart aching with the weight of his mistakes. He had a long road ahead of him, and he knew that earning Y/N’s forgiveness and trust would be the hardest thing he’d ever have to do. But for her, he was willing to do whatever it took.

Because he couldn’t bear the thought of a future without her, and he would fight to make things right, no matter how long it took.

Carlos carefully helped Y/N settle into his guest room, ensuring she had everything she needed. He placed her suitcase at the foot of the bed and fluffed the pillows before turning to her with a gentle smile.

“Mi niña, if you need anything, just let me know, okay?” he said softly, his voice full of warmth and concern.

Y/N nodded, her eyes red and puffy from crying. She tried to put on a brave face, but the moment Carlos wrapped her in a comforting hug, she broke down completely, sobbing into his chest.

“Shh, it’s okay, Y/N,” Carlos whispered, rubbing her back soothingly. “Everything will be okay. I promise.”

She clung to him, her body shaking with each sob. “I-I don’t know what to do, Carlos. It hurts so much.”

He held her tighter, his heart breaking at the sight of her pain. “I know, mi niña. I know it hurts. But you’re not alone. We’re here for you. Rebecca and I, we’ll take care of you.”

Y/N pulled back slightly, looking up at him with tear-filled eyes. “I just… I thought he would fight for us. For me.”

Carlos gently wiped away her tears, his expression one of deep sorrow and fierce protectiveness. “Lando made a mistake, and he’s going to regret it. But right now, you need to focus on yourself and the baby. You’re strong, Y/N. You’re going to get through this.”

She nodded, trying to believe his words. “Thank you, Carlos. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

He smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “You’re like a little sister to me. I’ll always be here for you, no matter what.”

Y/N leaned into his embrace, finding comfort in his unwavering support. “I just feel so lost.”

Carlos held her close, his voice gentle but firm. “You’re not lost, mi niña. You’re just finding a new path. And you have us to help you every step of the way.”

Rebecca entered the room quietly, carrying a tray with a cup of tea and some snacks. She placed it on the bedside table and joined them, wrapping her arms around Y/N as well.

“We’re going to take care of you,” Rebecca said softly. “You’re family to us, Y/N.”

Surrounded by their love and support, Y/N felt a small glimmer of hope. She still had a long road ahead of her, but with Carlos and Rebecca by her side, she knew she wouldn’t have to face it alone.

Carlos pulled back slightly, looking into her eyes. “Remember, mi niña, you’re stronger than you think. And we’ll be here to remind you of that every day.”

Y/N managed a small smile, her heart feeling a little lighter. “I’ll try to remember that. Thank you, Carlos. Thank you, Rebecca.”

Rebecca squeezed her hand gently. “We’re here for you, every step of the way.”

As Y/N settled into bed that night, she felt a sense of peace she hadn’t felt in weeks. She knew the journey ahead would be difficult, but with the support of those who loved her, she believed she could find her way.

Over the next few months Lando was adamant in trying to prove to Y/N that he will be there for her.

first instance: the midnight voicemail

Lando sat in his car outside Y/N's apartment, his fingers trembling as he held his phone. He had been doing this every night for the past six months, just listening to her voicemail. It was his way of feeling close to her, even when she needed space.

“Hey, it’s me, Lando,” he started, his voice soft and full of emotion. “I just wanted to say goodnight. I know you’re probably asleep, but I hope you and the baby are doing well. I-I just needed to hear your voice. I miss you. I love you. my love.”

He ended the call, tears streaming down his face. He knew she might never listen to these voicemails, but it didn’t matter. It was his way of staying connected, of showing her he cared.

second instance: the doctor's appointment

Y/N sat in the waiting room, nervously tapping her foot. She glanced up as the door opened and Lando walked in, carrying a small bouquet of her favorite flowers. He smiled softly at her, his eyes filled with concern and love.

“I thought you might like these,” he said, handing her the flowers.

She took them, her heart warming at the gesture. “Thank you, Lan.”

They sat together, waiting for her name to be called. When it was time, Lando stood up, offering her his hand. She hesitated for a moment before taking it, feeling the warmth of his support.

During the appointment, he stayed by her side, asking the doctor questions and making sure she was comfortable. It was clear he was committed to being there for her and their baby, no matter what. Towards the end Y/N interlocked her fingers with his.

third instance: the late-night cravings

One night, Y/N woke up with a sudden craving for chocolate ice cream. She sighed, knowing it was late, but her craving was too strong to ignore. She was about to get dressed to go to the store when her phone buzzed.

A message from Lando: “Hey, just thinking about you baby. Do you need anything?”

She hesitated for a moment before replying, “Actually, yes. I’m craving chocolate ice cream. But it’s late, and I don’t want to bother you.”

Within minutes, her phone buzzed again. “On my way. Be there in 10.”

Ten minutes later, Lando knocked on her door, holding a bag with several tubs of chocolate ice cream. “I wasn’t sure which one you wanted, so I got a few different kinds,” he said with a sheepish smile.

Y/N’s heart swelled with gratitude. “Thank you, Lando. You didn’t have to do this. It means so much to me.”

He shrugged, his eyes full of warmth. “I want to. I want to be here for you, for both of you.”

fourth instance: the nursery

Lando had spent weeks secretly working on a nursery for their baby. He knew Y/N wanted to keep things simple, but he wanted to surprise her with something special. He enlisted the help of Carlos and Rebecca, who both supported him in his efforts to make things right.

One afternoon, he called Y/N and asked her to come over. When she arrived, he led her to the room that had once been his office. He opened the door, revealing a beautifully decorated nursery.

Tears filled Y/N’s eyes as she took in the sight. The walls were painted a soft, calming color, and there was a crib, a changing table, and a rocking chair. Everything was perfect.

“I wanted to show you that I’m committed to this, to our family,” Lando said, his voice full of emotion. “I know it’s just a room, but I hope it shows you how much I care.”

Y/N walked into the room, touching the crib and the soft blankets. “It’s beautiful, Lando. Thank you.”

He stepped closer, his eyes locked on hers. “I’ll always be here for you, Y/N. I promise.”

fifth instance: the ultrasound

The day of the ultrasound was a mix of excitement and nerves for Y/N. Lando had insisted on coming, even though he knew she still needed space. As they sat in the exam room, the technician prepped the equipment.

When the image of their baby appeared on the screen, Lando’s breath caught in his throat. Tears filled his eyes as he saw the tiny life they had created.

“That’s our baby,” he whispered, his voice full of awe.

Y/N looked at him, her own eyes filled with tears. “Yes, it is.”

He reached for her hand, squeezing it gently. “Thank you for letting me be here baby. I wouldn’t want to miss this for the world.”

Six months had passed, and Y/N knew Lando had done everything he could to prove his love and commitment. One evening, she found herself standing outside his apartment again, her heart pounding in her chest.

She knocked, and moments later, Lando opened the door, his eyes widening in surprise and hope. “Y/N,” he said softly, stepping aside to let her in. “Come in, please.”

She walked in, the familiar scent of his apartment washing over her. It felt like stepping back into a memory, a life that had once been hers.

Lando closed the door and turned to face her, his heart in his throat. “How are you feeling love?” he asked, his voice full of genuine concern.

She placed a hand on her growing belly, a small smile playing on her lips. “I’m doing okay. The baby’s doing well.”

He nodded, his eyes shining with unshed tears. “I’m glad. I’m so glad.”

They stood in silence for a moment, the weight of everything unsaid hanging between them. Finally, Y/N spoke, her voice steady but soft. “Lando, I’ve seen how hard you’ve been trying. You’ve been there for me, even when I didn’t want you to be. And I appreciate it. I really do.”

He looked at her, his heart aching with regret and hope. “I’ll never stop trying, Y/N. I know I messed up, and I know I have a lot to make up for. But I love you. I love you and our baby, and I’ll do anything to prove that to you.”

Tears welled up in her eyes, and she took a deep breath. “I know you will. I can see that now. And I’m ready to give us another chance.”

Lando’s breath hitched, and he took a tentative step closer to her. “You are?”

She nodded, wiping away a tear. “Yes. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, and I’m not saying I’m not still hurt. But I want to try. I want us to try.”

He closed the distance between them, gently taking her hands in his. “I promise, Y/N. I’ll do everything I can to make things right. I’ll never take you for granted again.”

She squeezed his hands, her eyes searching his. “I need you to understand that it’s not just about words, Lan. It’s about actions. I need to know that you’re in this for the long haul, that you’re committed to us, to our family.”

He nodded, his eyes filled with determination. “I am. I swear I am. I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life.”

She let out a shaky breath, feeling a weight lift off her shoulders. “Okay. Then let’s do this. Together.”

Lando pulled her into a gentle hug, careful not to press too hard against her belly. “Thank you, Y/N. Thank you for giving me another chance. I won’t let you down.”

As they stood there, holding each other, the future seemed a little brighter, a little more hopeful. They had a long road ahead, but they were ready to face it together, hand in hand.

And for the first time in months, Y/N felt a sense of peace, knowing that they were going to be okay. That they were going to be a family. She was going to be with the man she loved and all was going to be right again.

the request -

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pixiecaps · 7 months ago

Text

recapping a bit of what haru said on stream

haru on her stream spoke about how shes had a really awful past five years and all her experiences just from this past year has been incredible. she gave a massive thank you to everyone and that she has no regrets.

“i never imagined i’d be where i am right now and i mean it with all my heart thank you so much. i had a very good time and i hope to have made you guys happy.”

she mentioned that since she was young shes always wanted to make content that makes people happy because she felt the world was missing a lot of love so shes happy to have given the world a piece of her heart. she mentioned how shes met so many incredible people who motivated her to see the good parts of life. to have found even this little bit of sunshine has left her so grateful. she says thank you for all the kindness, all the moments, all the memories, all the words, everything. shes very happy and mentioned this has been a very special experience for her. she reminded her chat that theres always another day and to enjoy life to the maximum, to live, to love, to talk, to hug each other, to be happy always, and that all the beautiful happiness we’ve given her will be returned back to us. she continues to express her gratitude. she mentioned this is one of the most beautiful communities shes ever had the pleasure of meeting in the entire world. she goes on to include the spanish, portuguese, french, english, german, and korean community in that statement.

“there is love in all types of languages and that love needs to be shared.“

she said her words will never be enough to express all her gratitude. she gave a reminder to always keep being kind. her voice falters a couple times from all the emotions. she mentioned shes cried enough and didn’t want to keep crying since she had something to do tomorrow and she didnt wanna have swollen eyes lmao.

she then shares a more personal moment. paraphrasing here.

“after i lost my dad i swear i felt like my life was falling apart. i never thought i’d be able to recover. after that many things happened and in those things, i wasnt destined to meet two people, this is a story i’ll always remember because i wasnt destined to meet these people. … they tell me hey the actor for this little thing didn’t show up and i say no way seriously? tell them to let me be it, tell them please because i want to be with you guys (harus two friends who were apart of the project). and i didnt think they’d agree… and they said yes. and i met two very important people and honestly (starts crying) thank you so much. thank you so much nussa. thanks to you i was able to meet them. i never imagined this would happen i promise you. thank you nussa. it means a lot to me that you decided to put me (into the leo spot). the only major thing in my life, i started being so happy, i started enjoying all the moments in my life as if it were the last, thanks to all this i’m here. and could meet you all. such a beautiful community.” she goes on to keep thanking nussa while crying and saying it was written in the stars. she goes on to say that shes gonna tell this as a story some day to her family, who doesnt know what she does or that she streams, and she’ll tell them about all of this with so much care and love. shes very thankful to have learned so much english and more about so many different cultures. she again reiterates shes very happy.

she also teases that she wants to go to brazil!!!! which… might be soon… and that theres little things being planned so hopefully if all goes well…👀 (an egg admin meetup would go so hard)

NOW GO SUPPORT HER ON TWITCH @ HarumiVT

#qsmp #harumivt

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burrowdarling · 2 months ago

Text

Joe Burrow Alphabet (SFW)

Summary: some Joey B headcanons with the SFW alphabet trend

Pairings: Joe Burrow x reader

Warnings: none

Note: Hi! This is my first time doing the alphabet trend. I've thought about doing the NSFW next, let me know if that's something that would be of interest to you all!

Word Count: 1.9k

Check out my Masterlist here!

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

In public, Joe would be discreetly affectionate unless he feels the need to show someone who you belong to. It’s not about keeping you a secret but respecting your privacy and maintaining intimacy. In private, Joe loves to show you how much he loves you with kisses, hugs, and much more.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Joe would be such a supportive best friend, wanting to be your biggest supporter. You both met at Ohio state your freshman year. You had your first college class ever together and it was history ever since, staying close when he moved to LSU. You always found ways to stay connected despite the difference, finding ways to make each other laugh and visit whenever possible. Joe would always be someone you could depend on for anything.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Joe absolutely loves to cuddle. He’s such a big softy at heart and loves to melt into your arms after a long day on the field. Despite being as tall as he is, hell bend down to your level or try his best to be the little spoon when he’s feeling particularly clingy. On the other hand, with his size, Joe loves to have his arms around you when he can. Whether you’re cooking, on the couch, or lying in bed.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I think Joe would want to settle down in the future when he’s out of the NFL, but still appreciate the slow moments you have together in your shared space. It gives him a sense of normal life and keeps him grounded as the small-town kid from Athens. He loves the life you’re building together, appreciate the slow moments together at home.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I think it would take a lot for Joe to break up with you if you were in a long-term committed relationship. He takes his relationship seriously and wears his heart on his sleeve, wanting to work through any conflict he could have with you.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Similar to the previous, if Joe is serious about you, he would be all in with his commitment. I feel like Joe wouldn’t be in a rush to get married, however, the two of you knowing how special you are to one another and not needing a ring to show that. He has thought about how he would propose to you one day and wants to make sure the moment is memorable and intimate in the future.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

With you, Joe would be physically gentle (unless you requested him to be otherwise – but that’s a different alphabet). He would want to be soft with you, being able to take care of you. Joe would also be as emotionally understanding as he could. As mentioned, with it being hard for him to open up, he would try his best to hold space for you to feel your feelings with him.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Just like cuddles, Joe absolutely loves hugging you. It can ground him in times when he’s feeling a lot of emotions from a loss and feel connected to you in moments of excitement. He loves how he’s able to hold you tightly, loving that he can ground you when you’re anxious much like you do for him.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It’s something you both felt fairly early on, Joe technically saying it first but you reciprocated in the moment shortly after. It was a few months in when you both told each other, wanting to let the other know just how important you were to one another.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

As secure as Joe would feel in your relationship, he would also be very possessive over you and want everyone to know that you’re his. If someone was attempting to make a move on you, he would be sure to make some kind of public display to make it known that you’re off-limits (as much as he loves his privacy).

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Joe’s kisses can be slow and sensual when he wants them to be or also short and quick when he’s in a rush. Joe doesn’t like to rush anything with you typically but will give you small kisses to show affection if that’s his only option at the time.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Joe absolutely loves kids and would love to have his own with you someday. You get to see how caring he is with his younger fans and how they light up when they meet him. It absolutely warms your heart to see how he takes his time with kids and give them his full attention.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

On days off, your mornings are slow and cozy. Joe would love to bring you breakfast in bed. There would be no rush to go anywhere or do anything, enjoying the time you have together and make the most of it. On workdays, Joe would leave you sweet notes to let you know he was thinking of you when you woke up.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Similar to your mornings, your nights are spent making dinner with one another and enjoying whatever movie or show piques your interest that night. Spending some good quality time with each other. You’d also take the time to do your nightly routines together, winding down for the night in each other’s company. On days one of you is working late, the other will have food prepared for the other to have a quick meal before bed, a mutual understanding that you can wake the other to let them know you’re home safe.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Joe’s a fairly closed off person and it can take a lot for him to open up. I think with the right person, he’d be able to let them in once he builds that trust with a partner. He would be able to let down his defenses and share his emotions over time through practice and your constant support.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

I feel like Joe would be fairly patient, taking the time to work things out with you and wanting to understand. There are definitely things that would get under his skin and diminish his patience faster than he would like to admit.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

I think Joe would remember certain details about you but make notes in his phone about different things that you mention in passing. He would keep a record of your different orders or sizes to be able to get you different surprises when he wants to show you how much he cares.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Joe’s favorite moment would be when he realized you were the one. There was nothing specific that you said or did, there was just a shift when you were spending more time together one of the times you came to visit him at school. He always knew you were special to him since you were best friends, but it was the moment he knew that it was more.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Similar to what was mentioned under Jealousy, joe would be extremely protective of you. He knows that you can hold your own but enjoys that he can make you feel safe and secure. He loves that he’s able to be your support person in times when you need him, not hesitating to let him knowing you can count on him to be there for you.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

I feel like Joe would try his hardest to make sure you know that he loves you always. With his schedule during the season, it can be hard for him to make time for different things as much as he would like to spend more time with you. He would show you he cares with small gestures to remind you he loves you. This could be little notes he leaves before work, quick texts during the day when he’s thinking of you, or getting you flowers to show he cares when he’s not home.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

With how busy Joe can get, I can see him being messy. It wouldn’t be something that he would intentionally do, but just gets caught up in the stress and pace of the needs for the season. This can carry over into his locker, but he’s trying to stay more organized, knowing you’ve told him a clear space helps with a clear mind.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

I wouldn’t say Joe is vain, but he definitely like to make sure he looks good. He’s heard what everyone’s said about him but takes your compliments to heart. He loves the reaction he can get out of you when he wears a new outfit or tries something different with his appearance.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Once Joe realized you were the one, it would feel like you were the missing piece to his puzzle. You fit so perfectly into his life and brought such a light and happiness that he couldn’t see himself without you being there. It takes a lot of patience given his career and you were his biggest supporter whether it was in the crowd or from your living room.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Joe would love to see you in his clothing. Whether that’s his shirts, hoodies, or his jersey, he loves to see his clothing swallow up your frame with your height difference. He’ll keep getting you to wear them since they end up smelling like you when he gets them back. He wouldn’t tell you this though, letting it be his own little secret.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

People who don’t respect his boundaries, both person and your relationship. He also tries his hardest to block out negativity to not let what other people say get to him.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Joe goes to bed really early during the season (like 9pm early), making the time you spend together winding down special, knowing how important his sleep is to him.

Thank you so much for reading, please send in any requests or comments. I hope you enjoyed!

#joe burrow #cincinnati bengals #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow x reader #nfl imagine #joe burrow bengals #nfl #joe burrow fanfiction #Joe burrow alphabet #sfw alphabet #Joe burrow blurb

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kleopatra45 · 1 month ago

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Sun in the Signs of D9 Chart

Aries

Born with Sun in Aries Placement in Navamsa Chart, you have a motion of your own and an inherent yearning for commitment free relationships. You will hardly be drawn to someone passive; you have a fiercely independent nature and so looks for an equally confident and determined partner who is ready to take charge. Chances are that this spouse will be active, blunt and daring and will encourage you to take risks in your life. They will urge you to embrace your inner self, will help you strive to ascend to greater heights and will never shrink from your side during thrill seeking and courageous activities. With them, life becomes a journey that is worth the effort and is interesting.

Taurus

For those with Taurus Sun in the D9 chart, you appreciate steadiness and fidelity while taking relationships seriously. There is a high chance you will find a partner who is easy-going, patient, and dependable, one who enjoys life and the little things it offers. This person may be industrious and focused on creating a secure and warm life. You both will share an interest in creating a calm household, relishing the mundanities reputation brings. The partner expresses affection through trust and harmony thus fostering a sense of peace that fortifies the ties.

Gemini

With the sun positioned in Gemini in the D9 chart you love anything and everything that stimulates your physical or intellectual prowess and need variations in relationships. The perfect spouse is stilts witty, well spoken, inherently inquisitive, and it is of course especially fond of conversations and bright ideas. This person may be young at heart, ready to bend down flexible, ever longing to learn or experience other things, thereby averting boredom in the relationship. In no time,; there will be constant laughter, travel and shared hobbies. The partner would care about the mental aspect, besides, the spouse will be whimsical and clever, which will enliven the added peace in the marriage.

Cancer

With the Sun being positioned in Cancer in the Navamsa chart, a person craves emotional closeness and bonding in relationships. He or she looks for a spouse who is kind, caring, and protective, one who loves family, home and instills a sense of security. This person may be nurturing, and sensitive, and be able to connect with how you are feeling. They’ll most likely be a caregiver who encourages you and makes you comfortable within the confines of the relationship. As a couple, you’ll build a relationship that is based on trust, warmth and hopes for the future. This person will love you deeply and make you feel a very Zen feeling at a soul level.

Leo

With the Sun in Leo in the D9 chart, you are a warm, faithful and spirited individual who needs a partner with the same level of activity. More often than not, you will have an affable, self-assured, big-hearted and emotional spouse who enjoys sharing his or her feelings and rejoicing in the pleasures of life. This individual will infuse the relationship with excitement, passion and artistic expression, as well as ensure you are treated like a king or a queen. You will be that power one couple relishing the affectionate, playful and admiring moments with each other. Your husband or wife will make profound romantic gestures which will be showering you with love.

Virgo

When a person has their Sun in Virgo in the Navamsa chart, they may look for a partner who is very meticulous, responsible, and willing to put in effort in making the relationship work. Such spouse would have a down to earth and nurturing personality who is keen on self-improvement and ensuring that you are supported. They will appreciate the little gestures of love and care as well as their consistent presence creating a source of solace. You will also work on establishing a bond that is beneficial to all which contrary to common belief, will not grow cold as each day will serve as an opportunity to strengthen your bond. Your partner will be considerate and thoughtful and will not hesitate to ensure that the relationship evolves positively.

Libra

With the Sun located in Libra in the D9 chart, you desire a relationship free from tension and fights. Most likely, you will find a spouse who is very charismatic, tactful, and who loves to build bridges. That person could be an aesthete who will help turn the union into a haven of love, respect, and beauty. In their midst, a graceful life will be achieved where common tastes, refinement, and deep comprehension will be present. A spouse will provide comfort and order, allowing both partners to achieve equilibrium and joyful interactions in the relationship.

Scorpio

In the D9 chart, sun sign in Scorpio indicates a deep need for emotional commitment in relationships. A person with such an ailment will most often be found in a passionate and sometimes enigmatic individual who strives to know her deeply. This may be a person of great inner strength and determination, who may be steadying yet also quite changeable in the role. You will create an intense relationship that seems almost spiritual, based on trust and faithfulness. You are married to a person who believes it’s okay to be weak because they would always be there to offer strength and support throughout the challenges of life.

Sagittarius

D9 Chart Sagittarius Sun indicates strong tendency towards freedom loving, adventurous and progressive relationships. Your prospective partner will probably be a liberal, visionary, and philosophical person who appreciates autonomy and travel. Such a partner will help you in overcoming any inhibitions and make you live fully, encouraging your zeal for exploration and adventure. This companionship will be enlivening, as both of you will share a common passion for activities, excursions, and education. Your spouse will instill a sense of liberation and elevation in you, prompting you to expand your horizons regarding life and relationships.

Capricorn

The D9 chart has the Sun placed in Capricorn, which means that you are protective, pragmatic and responsible in relationship matters. It is highly likely that the partner you will settle for will be an ambitious, hardworking and organized individual – one who cherishes future goals and ambitions. He or she may be practical and’s always working to ensure that there are no worries in the following days to come. Therefore, the two of you will work together to leave something tangible, while your spouse will provide order in the relationship. This will be a person you can count on, a person who will provide you with the much needed stability in every single one of your endeavors

Aquarius

You will desire a relationship that honors freedom and recognises each partner as an individual. When it comes to your partner, this in all likelihood will be a person with an unconventional, creative, and progressive way of thinking who appreciates original ideas and open-mindedness. They’ll be so different from you in a good way, that it will be a great challenge for you to think about doing things in a different way. You both would be able to enjoy a relationship which allows for both the partners to have their individual spaces without infringing on the others. Your spouse understand and encourage your need for independence and helps you feel loved and cherished in a relationship where you can be yourself.

Pisces

Sun in D9 Chart as Pisces makes an individual gravitate towards relationships that are incredibly emotional and spiritual, almost alien. Your spouse will probably be warm-hearted, sympathetic, and caring—someone whose heart speaks to you. That person can be sweet-natured and compassionate, always caring for you and eager to uplift your visions. It is a relationship in which both of you will form a sacred union with and interwoven concepts and feelings of closeness and emotional connection. A spouse is someone who will give you comfort and restore balance into your life, allowing you to seek a more meaningful relationship that is decidedly uplifting and restorative.

#astro notes #astroblr #astrology community #astrology #astrology observations #astrology readings #astrology tumblr #astro community #vedic astrology observations #solar return #vedic astro notes #vedicastrology #vedic astro observations #vedic astrology #vedic chart #d9 chart #navamsa chart

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reidmarieprentiss · 3 months ago

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Too Damn Young: Part Two

Summary: You and Spencer have been separated for three years, is that enough time to move on? For you, it would appear it is. Spencer doesn't know what to do when he gets your save-the-date in the mail.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Category: fluff, hurt/comfort, angst

Warnings/Includes: talks of divorce, keeping secrets from partner, alcohol consumption, impulsive decisions, breakups, argument with intoxicated Spencer, happy ending

Word count: 14k

a/n: sorry this took so long i got a very specific case of writer's block for this story ://

main masterlist part one

Three years had passed since Spencer Reid had moved away from you, but despite the physical distance, the love and bond you shared had managed to survive. Though the romantic part of your relationship had ended, your friendship remained strong and unbreakable.

Spencer kept you updated on his work at the BAU, sharing stories from the field and the challenges he faced. When your mom got married, knowing how difficult that event was for you, Spencer took time off from work to attend the wedding with you. His support was unwavering, even when he couldn’t be there in person. You would visit Diana when Spencer couldn’t, helping out in ways that kept you connected not only to him but also to his family.

Spencer continued to speak with your father regularly, keeping that connection alive even as your lives had diverged in different directions. In all, the two of you remained close, and your friendship had evolved into something even more profound, built on shared experiences, trust, and the deep understanding that comes from truly knowing each other.

A rock was thrown into the friendship you shared with Spencer, however, when he received a save-the-date card in the mail, addressed to him. As soon as he saw your name on it, so many emotions swarmed through his body that it made him physically ill. He scanned the card, his hands trembling as he tried to process the words. You were getting married. Again.

Spencer hadn’t even known you were seeing anyone, and now you were marrying someone? The realization hit him like a punch to the gut. His stomach twisted, and before he could stop it, he wretched and threw up, the shock and emotions overwhelming him completely.

He knew, logically, that the two of you were long since over. He had tried to move on. He had seen people off and on, but never took anything too seriously, never fully allowed himself to fall. Because, in the back of his mind, Spencer had always assumed that the two of you were destined to find your way back to each other. He never let go of that hope, and now, seeing your save-the-date, that hope was shattered.

In a moment of sheer panic and desperation, Spencer dialed Derek’s number, his voice breaking as he begged, “Please, Derek… come over, I—I need you.” He was crying, the words tumbling out incoherently, leaving Derek no choice but to rush to his best friend’s side, not knowing what had caused such an outburst of emotion.

When Derek arrived, Spencer had managed to somewhat compose himself, though the distress was still written all over his face. He motioned for Derek to sit, and with shaky breaths, he spilled everything. From the day you and Spencer met in Tahoe, to the whirlwind of dating, to your marriage, and ultimately, the divorce. Spencer had kept this part of his life hidden from the team, only ever referring to you as a “friend from college,” never revealing the deep connection the two of you once shared.

Derek listened, taking it all in with wide eyes, surprised but trying to make sense of it. Spencer had never been one to open up about personal matters, let alone something this big.

Then, Spencer threw the save-the-date card onto the table in front of Derek, the final piece of the puzzle falling into place. Derek picked it up, his face softening with understanding. He could see why this had devastated Spencer, why the younger man had broken down.

“Man… I didn’t know,” Derek said quietly, his voice filled with empathy. “I didn’t know you were still holding onto that.”

Spencer rubbed his eyes, his whole body slumped in defeat. “I thought… I thought maybe one day… we’d find our way back to each other. But now… she’s marrying someone else.”

Derek shook his head, unsure of what advice to offer. How do you console someone who’s just realized the future they’d been holding onto no longer existed?

“I’m sorry, Reid,” Derek sighed, pulling Spencer into a tight hug, feeling the weight of his friend's emotions. He didn’t know what else to say. He could feel how deeply this was hurting Spencer, and it pained him to see his best friend like this. “What are you going to do?”

Spencer leaned into Derek’s embrace, his body still trembling slightly as he huffed out a breath. “I guess… I’m going to the wedding,” he said, his voice filled with resignation. “She’s my best friend. I can’t… not be there for her.”

Derek, trying to find a way to lift the mood, jolted Spencer a bit, grinning mischievously. “Excuse you? I thought your best friend was sitting in front of you right now.”

A small laugh escaped Spencer, a brief moment of light in the middle of his turmoil. “You're right,” he admitted, chuckling softly. “Thank you, Derek. Really.”

Derek smiled, glad to have gotten a laugh out of him, but he knew it would take more than that to pull Spencer out of his spiral. So, for the rest of the day, Derek stayed by his side, doing whatever Spencer wanted—whether it was playing chess, watching documentaries, or just sitting in silence. Anything to keep his mind off the fact that the love of his life was getting married to someone else.

And, perhaps worst of all, she hadn’t told him anything about it until the save-the-date arrived. That, Derek knew, was what was really eating at Spencer—the idea that he wasn’t as much a part of your life as he once thought.

—

Spencer hadn’t reached out since receiving your save-the-date, unable to find the right words. Instead, he threw himself into spending more time with his colleagues and friends, agreeing to every social outing they planned. He was trying to distract himself, to drown out the constant noise in his head about what your upcoming marriage meant for him.

Tonight, he found himself whiskey tasting with Rossi, Hotch, and Derek. As the evening wore on and the whiskey flowed freely, their conversations grew looser, more personal. Rossi and Hotch began comparing their divorce stories, laughing about their past pain and the fleeting joys of their marriages. Derek looked over at Spencer, knowing full well the turmoil going on beneath his quiet exterior, being the only one who knew about Spencer’s secret heartbreak.

Spencer seemed to be somewhere else entirely, lost in his own world, not really listening to the conversation. Derek wasn’t sure if that was good or bad, but he was silently relieved when Spencer excused himself to go to the bathroom. Maybe it was better if he didn’t hear the rest of this conversation.

But instead of heading to the bathroom, Spencer stepped outside, pulling out his phone and making a decision he would soon regret. His fingers fumbled as he dialed your number. The alcohol had loosened his inhibitions, and all the pent-up frustration and hurt were boiling over.

The worst part? You answered.

“Spencer? Hi!” Your voice was warm but slightly distracted. “I’m still at work, is everything okay?”

Of course. The time difference. He hadn’t even thought about that. “I’m fine, Y/N,” he hiccuped, clearly not fine at all. “Well, no, I’m not. Why didn’t you tell me you were seeing someone?”

You were silent on the other end for a moment, the weight of his question hanging in the air. Finally, you sighed deeply. “Spencer… can we not do this right now? I can call you tomorrow.”

“No!” Spencer's voice was louder than intended, his frustration rising. “We need to do this now. I deserve an explanation.”

You sighed again, and Spencer could hear you moving around, likely retreating to a quieter place in your office. “Okay. Fair enough. I started seeing Noa about two years ago. They’re amazing, Spence. I just… I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“So you thought sending me a save-the-date was better?” Spencer’s voice raised again, the whiskey fueling his anger. “That’s messed up, and you know it.”

“I know,” you said quietly. “I was scared. I’m sorry.”

Spencer’s brain was spinning, but one thought stood out. “Wait… you’ve only been together for two years?” His voice had grown darker, accusatory.

“Yeah. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, okay?” you said, your voice strained but still calm, trying to diffuse the situation.

“You’re just rushing into marriage again!” Spencer shot back, the words spilling out before he could stop them. His frustration, his heartbreak, everything he had buried for the last five years, it all came pouring out.

“What?” you asked, your voice coming out small and weak, despite the fact that you wished it had been strong, confident, maybe even cold. But it wasn’t. The hurt you felt made it tremble.

Spencer scoffed, his frustration bubbling over. “You’re just jumping into another relationship without thinking about the consequences.”

You blinked, shocked at the accusation. “How would you know what I’m doing? I haven’t seen you since my mom’s wedding… that was three years ago,” you shot back, your voice firmer now, though still tinged with hurt.

“Right, how could I forget?” Spencer’s voice grew louder, his emotions spiraling out of control. “You were flirting with every pair of long legs that walked by, in front of me!”

You were taken aback, your heart pounding in disbelief. “What? No, I did not! And besides, what would it matter if I did?” you spat out, the pain in your voice evident now. “You left me, Spencer.”

The words hung in the air, heavy and full of unresolved heartache.

“Is that how you remember it?” Spencer asked, his heart breaking even more, his voice softer now but filled with sorrow.

“That’s how it happened,” you said, a tear slipping down your cheek, because as much as you loved him, as much as he had been a huge part of your life, the wound of his departure was still raw.

“Well, I’m very sorry that’s how you see it,” Spencer said, his voice steadying now as the alcohol-induced haze began to lift, leaving behind the weight of reality.

You nodded, even though you knew Spencer couldn’t see you, and tried to keep your voice from breaking. “Mhm,” you managed, holding back the sob that was lodged in your throat.

“That’s it?” Spencer pressed, his frustration giving way to something closer to disbelief.

“Mhm,” you repeated, not trusting yourself to say much more without unraveling completely.

“You don’t have anything else you want to say to me?”

A quiet, almost broken, “Mm mm,” was all you could offer. The tears were too close now, and speaking felt impossible.

There was a long pause on Spencer’s end, the tension between you both palpable even through the phone. “Bye, Y/N,” he said finally, the weight of those two words heavier than you’d ever imagined. And with that, Spencer hung up.

He returned to his friends at the whiskey tasting, but his heart wasn’t in it anymore. He opted out of the rest of the drinks, choosing instead to just sit in their company, trying to find some comfort in the camaraderie, even though his mind was miles away, back with you, replaying the conversation in his head.

—

As you sat in your office, the weight of the conversation with Spencer bearing down on you, the flood of emotions finally broke free. Your body shook with barely concealed sobs, and as much as you tried to hold it together, it was too much. The truth was painfully clear—you knew why you couldn’t bring yourself to tell Spencer about Noa. How could you possibly tell the man you were still in love with that you were marrying someone else, someone who was there to fill the void he left behind?

It wasn’t that you didn’t love Noa. You did—deeply. They were everything you could ask for in a partner—amazing, generous, loving, and you were genuinely ecstatic to marry them. But that didn’t change the fact that Spencer was still there in your heart, occupying a space that no one else ever could.

A knock sounded at the door, breaking through your thoughts. “Y/N? Sweetie, can I come in?” Alexi’s voice came from the other side. Your assistant manager, your number two, and more importantly, your best friend.

You wiped at your tear-streaked cheeks, trying to pull yourself together. “Yeah.”

Alexi pushed open the door, taking one look at your broken figure and immediately coming over. “Oh baby, what happened?” they asked, their voice soft with concern.

You sighed, pushing yourself up to sit on the desk beside them. “Spencer called… he’s upset.”

Alexi didn’t need you to explain more. They knew everything—they had been there after Spencer had left, helping you pick up the pieces of your life. They wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close in a comforting embrace. “I told you he wouldn’t react well,” they said, never one to sugarcoat the truth.

You let out a tearful laugh, nodding. “You did. And I should’ve listened.”

Alexi rubbed your back, offering silent support before they asked, “Are you going to tell Noa?”

You shook your head immediately. “No. Noa doesn’t need to know.”

Alexi’s sigh was deep, full of the understanding but firm truth they always brought to your conversations. “Yes, they do, sweetie. Spencer is always going to be a part of you. Noa deserves to know all of the person they’re marrying.”

You swallowed hard, feeling the truth of their words but resisting it all the same. “Spencer is… he’s mine, you know?” Your voice cracked slightly. “He’s a part of my past, encapsulated like a snow globe just for me. I don’t want Noa to know all the details. What if they don’t want to marry me if they do?”

Alexi squeezed your shoulder gently, looking you directly in the eyes. “Y/N… keeping secrets isn’t a good way to start a marriage. If Noa decides they don’t want to marry you because of what happened, then that’s how it’s going to be. But they deserve to know the whole person they’re committing to.”

The weight of their words sank in, but it didn’t make it any easier. You knew they were right. But admitting the depth of what Spencer still meant to you, and risking ruining another relationship because of it, felt impossible. Spencer was yours—a part of you that no one else could touch. And you didn’t want to lose anyone else by dragging him into your present, when he was meant to stay in the past, locked away safely in your heart and mind.

So you went along with the wedding planning, trying to stay present, but the excitement you had once felt for this kind of event was dimmed. Your moms, both of them now, took charge, pulling you and Alexi along for dress shopping. You went through the motions, smiling when you were supposed to, but in the back of your mind, it felt like something was always missing. Maybe it was because you had done this before—planning a wedding, preparing for a future you thought was set in stone. That time, you were marrying your best friend, your soulmate. Nothing could have brought you down.

Now, though, it felt like everything was falling apart.

You found a dress you didn’t hate, but when you discovered it wasn’t made in your size, your heart sank. The tailoring bills would be through the roof. And there was no way you could ask your parents to help with another wedding, let alone explain that to Noa. So you settled for a different dress, something more practical, less special. It was a compromise, and one of many.

Then there were the flowers—your (second) favorite flowers, the ones you had dreamed of having at your wedding since you got engaged. But you couldn’t have them. As it turned out, Noa was allergic. How that had eluded you for two years, you’d never know, but it felt like another loss, another thing you had to give up.

The food? That was another issue entirely. Noa was vegan and gluten-free, which was fine—you supported them in that. But it meant you couldn’t have any of the dishes you wanted at your wedding, and the excitement over picking a menu disappeared entirely. It wasn’t about the food; it was about the mounting compromises that made you feel like you were losing more of yourself in the process.

Then, as if the universe wanted to add insult to injury, the live band you’d booked canceled last minute. They refunded half the deposit, but it wasn’t nearly enough to book a new band, and you were left scrambling for a backup.

It was all a mess. And through it all, the only RSVP that mattered to you—Spencer’s—still remained unanswered. Even Diana had agreed to come, and your father had offered to travel with her from Nevada. But Spencer’s name sat unmarked on the list, and the weight of his silence felt heavier than everything else combined.

—

It was late, and the bullpen was eerily quiet—long after everyone else had gone home for the night. The soft, dim glow of desk lamps was the only light illuminating the space, and Spencer sat hunched over at his desk, staring blankly at a stack of files, though his mind was miles away. He couldn’t concentrate, couldn’t shake the thoughts of you that had been circling his mind like an endless loop ever since that phone call. The way your voice had cracked, the words you hadn't said hanging heavy in the silence afterward.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair, the weight of it all pressing down on his chest like a vice. Spencer didn’t notice Penelope walking out of her office until she was standing right in front of him, her bright pink coat draped over one arm, a concerned look etched on her face.

“Hey, Boy Wonder,” she said softly, leaning against his desk. “What are you still doing here? It’s way past your bedtime.”

Spencer glanced up at her, forcing a small, weak smile that didn't reach his eyes. “Just... thinking, I guess,” he murmured, looking back down at the files in front of him, though he wasn’t really reading them.

Penelope’s eyes narrowed slightly. She knew Spencer well enough to recognize when something was wrong, and this didn’t look like his typical bouts of insomnia. “Uh-uh, that won’t fly,” she said, her tone firm but gentle. “What’s really going on, Reid?”

He hesitated, his fingers nervously tapping against the edge of his desk. He didn’t know where to begin, how to explain the mess of feelings tangled up inside him—the regret, the longing, the fear that he’d lost you for good. But Penelope had a way of pulling things out of him, and before he knew it, he was talking. Telling her everything.

“It’s... it’s about someone from my past,” Spencer admitted, staring down at his hands. He could feel the heat rising in his face, the weight of the secret that he’d kept for so long bearing down on him. “Her name is Y/N. We... we were close.”

Penelope’s eyes widened as she quickly pulled out the chair across from Spencer and sat down, leaning in closer. “Wait, wait, wait, slow down,” she said, a look of shock and curiosity flashing across her face. “Who is Y/N? And how do I not know about her? You’ve never mentioned her before, Spencer!”

Spencer ran a hand through his hair, fidgeting nervously. “That’s kind of the point. I never told anyone. Well... except Morgan, recently. But... it’s complicated, Penelope.”

“Complicated how?” Penelope’s voice was gentle, but there was an urgency to it—a desire to understand. “How... close were you two?”

Spencer hesitated, his fingers tapping anxiously against the edge of his desk. He knew he couldn’t keep everything bottled up any longer. “We were... really close. We met when we were both eighteen, and we... got married. And then divorced. And then stayed friends,” he said quickly, the words tumbling out all at once. “And I never told anyone because it felt like... like this part of my life that didn’t fit with everything else. Like a different person I used to be.”

Penelope’s jaw dropped, and for once, she was speechless. Her eyes darted around his face, as if trying to comprehend the enormity of what he’d just shared. “Spencer Reid, you were married?” she finally managed to say, her voice squeaking at the end. “And divorced? And you never... you never said anything?”

Spencer gave a small, helpless shrug. “Yeah. I know, I should’ve told you all a long time ago. But it’s... it’s a lot to explain, and I guess I just... buried it.”

Penelope blinked a few times, trying to process everything. “Okay, okay,” she said, holding up a hand to stop herself from spiraling. “So... Y/N. You were married to her. And now you’re... friends?”

Spencer nodded, feeling a mixture of relief and anxiety at finally sharing this part of his life. “Yeah, friends. We kept in touch over the years. But she’s... she’s getting married again. And I... I found out through a save-the-date in the mail.”

“Whoa, wait, wait,” Penelope cut in, holding up her hand. “She’s getting married? Like, married married? And she didn’t tell you?”

He nodded, the pain in his chest tightening at the memory. “Yeah. And I got upset, and I—I probably said some things I shouldn’t have. And now... I can’t stop thinking about her, and it’s driving me crazy.”

Penelope’s expression softened, her eyes filled with understanding. She reached across the desk, placing her hand over Spencer’s. “Spencer,” she said softly, “you know why you can’t stop thinking about her, right?”

Spencer sighed, biting his lip as he nodded. “Because I still love her,” he admitted, the words feeling both like a relief and a weight off his shoulders. “I never stopped. I thought I was fine with just being her friend, with us being apart, but...”

“But you’re not fine,” Penelope finished for him, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. “And you don’t have to be. She was your first love, and that kind of thing doesn’t just go away.”

“I know.” He closed his eyes, shaking his head as if trying to clear his thoughts. “But she’s engaged, and she seems happy. I can’t just... disrupt her life like that.”

Penelope let out a soft huff, her eyes full of determination. “Spencer Reid, I know you like to overthink things, but this is one of those times where you need to be honest. If you have feelings for her, if you think there’s a chance—any chance—that she feels the same way, then you owe it to yourself to tell her. Before it’s too late.”

Spencer looked up at her, a flicker of hope mixing with fear in his eyes. “But what if it is too late? What if... what if she doesn’t feel the same? What if I just make everything worse?”

Penelope’s smile was soft but firm, her voice steady as she spoke. “That’s a risk you’ll have to take, Reid. But it’s better to take that risk than to spend the rest of your life wondering what if. You deserve to be happy. And if she’s the person who makes you happy, then you need to fight for that.”

Spencer didn’t respond right away, the weight of her words settling over him as he considered them. He had spent so long running from his feelings, trying to bury them under the guise of friendship, trying to convince himself that he was okay with you moving on. But the truth was, he wasn’t okay. And maybe, just maybe, he needed to do something about it.

“Thanks, Penelope,” he said quietly, a small, genuine smile finally tugging at the corners of his mouth. “I... I think I needed to hear that.”

She grinned, standing up and patting his shoulder. “Anytime, genius. Now go home, get some rest, and think about what you’re going to say. You’ve got this.”

And with that, she walked away, leaving Spencer alone in the quiet bullpen, but with a sense of clarity he hadn’t felt in years. He knew what he needed to do. It was terrifying, it was messy, but it was right.

He needed to talk to you. To tell you how he felt. Before it really was too late.

—

The hours of the night ticked by slowly as Spencer lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling of his apartment. Every attempt to sleep had been thwarted by the constant thoughts of you—the weight of the conversation with Penelope, the memories of your time together, and the sharp, raw feeling that he was running out of time. He couldn’t shake it. Every breath felt heavier than the last, and the silence of his apartment only amplified the whirlwind of emotions crashing around in his head.

At some point, the moonlight gave way to the faintest hint of dawn, but still, Spencer didn’t sleep. He just lay there, feeling like a boy again, filled with that same sense of panic and yearning he hadn’t felt in years. But there, in the early morning light, it finally hit him—what he had to do.

He shot up in bed, heart pounding, the idea forming fully in his mind. He had to tell you. He couldn’t wait any longer; he couldn’t let the fear, or doubt, or whatever this was, stop him. He had to tell you how he felt, face-to-face. Whatever happened, whatever you said, at least then he could say he tried.

Before he knew what he was doing, he was on his feet, pacing the length of his room, grabbing his phone, his wallet, hastily packing a bag. He barely had time to think the plan through—there was no plan. There was only the need to see you, to make things right, or at least to make his feelings known. He booked a flight to California within minutes, his hands shaking as he entered his credit card details, the urgency pushing him forward with every click.

The airport was a blur of noise and motion. The world seemed to move around him while his focus remained narrowed to a single thought—you. Spencer sat in his seat on the plane, the hours of the flight feeling endless as his knee bounced restlessly, and his fingers drummed against the armrest. He had no idea what he would say to you, how he would find the words to make sense of everything. He only knew that he had to see you.

When the plane finally landed, the sun was bright and warm, the California heat a stark contrast to the cool air of Virginia. He didn’t even take a moment to collect himself; he just grabbed his bag and rushed through the terminal, out into the familiar streets he hadn’t seen in years. The world around him blurred with motion and sound, but none of it registered. His only thought was getting to you.

But as Spencer stepped outside of the airport, the rush of determination he felt on the plane quickly started to fizzle out. The realization hit him like a punch to the gut—he had no idea where you lived anymore. The apartment you had shared when you were married was long gone, and though he kept up with you through your phone calls and letters, he didn’t know if you and your fiancé had found a place of your own, if you were living together at all.

He stood on the sidewalk, the California sun beating down on him, making him feel both restless and lost. There was no time to panic, though; he had come all this way, and he couldn’t just stand there like a fool. He needed to find you. And fast.

The next best thing was to hail a cab and give the driver directions to the one place he knew you would eventually be—your bookstore. He paid the fare quickly and grabbed his bags, rushing inside the shop, his eyes darting around, scanning the familiar shelves, the worn floorboards, the comforting smell of old books.

A bell above the door chimed as he stepped inside, and a young employee behind the counter looked up, offering a polite smile. “Hi, welcome in,” they said, but their voice didn’t really register. Spencer was too caught up in the whirlwind of his thoughts, in the desperation that had brought him here.

“Is Y/N here?” he rushed out, his voice high with nerves, his hands clenched tightly around the strap of his bag.

The employee’s smile faltered slightly at the urgency in his voice, and they gave him a curious look, one that seemed to ask who the hell he was and why he seemed so frantic. “Um, no, she’s not here,” they said slowly. “She’s wedding planning today.”

Spencer’s heart sank further. Of course, you’d be busy with wedding planning—it was all you were doing these days. But the reality of it stung, like a reminder that he was too late, that you were already too far gone into your new life.

“Do you know where I could find her?” he asked, trying to keep the pleading tone out of his voice but failing. He was holding onto the hope that maybe, just maybe, he could track you down.

But the employee just shook their head, their face softening into a look of pity. “No, sorry. I really don’t. I think she’s meeting with a wedding planner or looking at venues, something like that.”

Spencer swallowed hard, feeling the walls of the bookstore closing in on him. He had been so sure of what he needed to do, so convinced that coming here would give him the answers he was looking for. But now, standing there, with no clue where to go next, he felt like a man adrift, a stranger in a place that was once so familiar.

“Okay,” he managed to choke out, trying to keep his voice steady. “Thank you.”

“Uh, yeah, sure,” the employee replied, their eyes still fixed on him like he was a puzzle they couldn’t quite figure out.

Spencer turned on his heel and walked out of the store, the bell chiming behind him as he left. He stood on the sidewalk, taking a deep breath to steady himself, to fight back the rising panic. He didn’t know where you were. He had no idea how to find you. And he had no plan.

But he wasn’t ready to give up. Not yet.

Spencer stood on the sidewalk, the desperation clawing at his chest like a living thing. His heart pounded, the reality of his situation finally starting to sink in. He had come all this way, but he didn’t know where to find you.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket, his fingers shaking as he quickly dialed Penelope. She picked up on the first ring, her voice chirping through the line. “Hey, genius, what’s up?”

“Penelope,” he said quickly, the urgency in his voice making it clear that this wasn’t a casual call. “I need your help. I need to know where Y/N lives. Can you find her address?”

“What? Wait, why? Spencer, what’s going on?” Penelope’s voice was full of confusion, and he could hear her clicking away on her keyboard in the background.

“There’s no time to explain. Please, just... please, Penelope, can you find it?” He knew he was asking a lot, putting her on the spot like this, but he didn’t know what else to do. He needed to see you.

“Okay, okay, hang on,” she said, the rapid clicking of her keyboard growing louder as she searched for your information. “Got it. She lives at XXXX S Higuera St.”

“Thank you,” Spencer said, the words rushing out of him like a breath he’d been holding in. “I owe you one.”

“Yeah, you do,” Penelope said, her voice somewhere between worried and annoyed. “Now go get her, cowboy.”

Spencer hung up and flagged down another cab, rattling off your address to the driver, who sped off in the direction of your house. The drive felt longer than it should have, every minute dragging on like an eternity, the silence in the car filled only with the beating of his heart and the hum of the engine. He watched the city rush by in a blur, every moment bringing him closer to you.

When they finally pulled up to the row of houses, Spencer fumbled with his wallet, throwing bills at the driver and mumbling a hurried “Keep the change,” before jumping out, his bag slung over his shoulder. He stood in front of your house, staring at the navy-blue door that stood between him and you. This was it. There was no going back now.

He lifted his hand and knocked, the sound echoing louder than he anticipated, every thud ringing in his ears. And then he waited, holding his breath as he heard footsteps approaching the door, his whole body tense and shaking with anticipation.

The door swung open, and there you were. You looked different than he’d remembered, yet exactly the same. Your eyes widened in shock, your phone still pressed to your ear.

“Uh, Alexi, I’m going to have to call you back,” you said into the phone, your voice thick with surprise. “Yeah, I’m fine.” There was a pause, and then you said softly, “Thank you, love you too. Bye.” You hung up, your eyes never leaving his, the weight of the moment hanging heavy between you.

“Spencer? What the fuck?” you finally said, and the sound of your voice hit him like a punch—familiar, angry, bewildered, and all of it wrapped in a painful confusion.

He took a breath, trying to steady himself, to find the words he’d rehearsed in his mind a hundred times, but they all fled as he stood there, face-to-face with you. He was speechless, overwhelmed by everything he felt, and everything he hadn’t let himself feel for so long.

“I—” he started, but his voice faltered. He took another breath, gathering his thoughts. “I know this is... a surprise. I know you’re mad. But I had to come, Y/N. I had to see you. I just... I need to talk to you.”

“You couldn’t call?” you asked, the mix of surprise and annoyance evident in your voice. You were clearly caught off guard by his sudden appearance, and you had every right to be. Spencer was out of breath, the tension between you almost unbearable as he searched for the right words.

“It’s too important,” he managed, his voice a blend of urgency and regret. He could feel the weight of the moment pressing down on him, the desperation to make you understand why he was here.

You stared at him for a moment longer, a storm of emotions flashing across your face—confusion, frustration, and something softer that he couldn't quite place. “Okay... come in.�� Your voice was softer now, but guarded.

You stepped back, allowing him to walk into the foyer. The smell of your home washed over him—familiar, yet different from the last place you shared together. He followed as you led him into the living room, the warmth of the space feeling like an extension of you. The cozy seating, soft lighting, and small personal touches made it welcoming and lived-in.

“Just... stay here for a minute,” you said quietly before disappearing into another room, leaving Spencer standing awkwardly by the couch. He took in everything—the framed photos on the walls, the plants that seemed to thrive under your care, the comfortable arrangement of the furniture. It all felt so you, and so foreign to him at the same time.

After a few minutes, you returned, carrying two cups of tea in your hands. You set one down in front of him and sat down across from him, holding your own cup tightly, as if it was anchoring you. “Sorry,” you murmured, avoiding his gaze. “I don’t have your brand anymore.”

Spencer gave a small, understanding nod, a bittersweet smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “It’s okay,” he said softly. He cradled the cup between his hands, feeling the warmth seep through his fingers. He didn’t know how to start, how to break the silence that felt so loud between you. All he knew was that he needed to be here, to find the right words, to make sense of this tangled mess of feelings.

The only sound was the faint clinking of the spoon against the porcelain as you stirred your tea, neither of you looking at each other, both waiting for someone to break the silence.

Spencer glanced down at the steam rising from his cup, feeling the burn of your words more than the heat of the tea. He knew you were right—the last time you spoke, things were... ugly. Painful. He had been angry, and confused, and felt like he was losing you all over again.

“Why are you here, Spencer?” you sighed, your voice carrying the exhaustion of all the times you’d thought about him, about the complicated knot of your past. “Last time we talked, you seemed pretty pissed.”

He winced, gripping the cup tighter, feeling the porcelain edge bite into his skin. “I know,” he said quietly, finally daring to look up and meet your eyes. “I was... I was angry. And I shouldn’t have—I didn’t mean to take it out on you like that. I—” He paused, fumbling for the right words. “I shouldn’t have called you, not like that. It wasn’t fair.”

You stayed quiet, your eyes searching his face, waiting for the explanation you knew was coming. Spencer felt himself shrinking under the weight of your gaze, but he pressed on, knowing this was the only chance he had to make things right. “I came here because... because I need to talk to you. To see you.” He took a breath, the words coming out more rushed now, desperate. “And I know it’s selfish, but I couldn't stop thinking about you—about us. About everything we never said.”

The tension hung in the air, like a line pulled taut between you, ready to snap. He leaned forward, his voice pleading. “Please, just hear me out. Let me say what I came here to say.”

You felt your blood drain from your face, a cold, tingling numbness spreading through your body. This was it, the conversation you’d been dreading—and yet, somehow, you knew it was inevitable. Your heart hammered against your ribs, your skin prickling with anxiety as sweat began to bead on your upper lip. You swallowed hard, gripping your cup tightly, using it as your anchor, grounding yourself in the reality of this moment.

All you could do was nod. There were so many things you wanted to say, to shout, to demand from him—but the words lodged themselves in your throat, refusing to come out. So, you stayed silent, allowing Spencer to speak, knowing you needed to hear whatever he had traveled all this way to say.

He took a deep breath, his fingers shaking slightly as he set his cup down on the table. He couldn’t look at you directly; it was too much. Instead, his eyes darted around the room, focusing on anything but your face, as he tried to gather his thoughts.

“I know this is... a lot,” he began, his voice barely above a whisper. “And I know that I have no right to come here and just... drop all of this on you.” He ran a hand through his hair, a familiar nervous gesture that made your heart ache. “But I need to be honest, because I can’t keep living with these... feelings and regrets.”

He finally forced himself to look at you, his eyes searching yours, pleading silently for you to understand. “When I called you that night, I was angry. Not only at you, but at myself. Because I realized I’ve never let you go. I thought that maybe if I stayed away, if I just... buried everything, it would go away. But it hasn’t.”

You felt your breath catch in your throat, his words hitting you like a wave, pulling you under. Your heart pounded harder, hope, fear, and dread swirling in your chest.

Spencer’s voice shook as he continued, the vulnerability in his words cutting through the tension. “I came here to tell you that I still love you,” he said, his eyes burning into yours, his face a mask of raw emotion. “I don’t know what that means for us, or if it changes anything. I just... I needed you to know. Because I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t at least tell you the truth.”

The silence that followed was deafening, your mind racing as you absorbed his confession. This was the moment you had both avoided for so long, the moment where everything hung in the balance. You could feel your heart hammering against your ribs, each beat echoing in the room as you processed his words.

“Please,” he whispered, his voice cracking. “Just... tell me what you’re thinking. Say something. Anything.”

“What do you want me to say?” you choked out, your voice strained and small, the whirlwind of emotions clawing at your insides making it impossible to find the right words. Everything he was saying felt like it came from a different lifetime—a different you, a different him, a different version of the love you used to share.

“Anything, please,” Spencer begged, his eyes wide and frantic as he searched your face for a hint of what you were feeling. “What are you thinking?”

You swallowed, feeling the words spill out before you could stop them. “I’m getting married,” you said, the reality of it crashing down on you like a wave.

Spencer’s head dropped immediately, his shoulders slumping as if all the life had drained out of him. “I know,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper, sounding as if saying the words broke something inside him. “I just thought maybe—”

“Maybe?” You couldn’t keep the sharpness from your voice, the anger and pain flooding through your system and finding their way into the space between you. “Maybe what?” You snapped, your emotions boiling over, unable to place what exactly you were feeling—love, anger, guilt, sadness, all at once, and none of them making sense. “You think you can just show up here and what? That I’d—”

But before you could finish, before either of you could continue spiraling down this road of raw and messy confessions, the jingle of keys being put into a lock pierced through the tense air, and both of your heads snapped toward the front door. Your blood ran cold as you realized what it meant.

Noa was home.

Your fiancé stepped inside, the warm light from the hallway spilling in behind them, painting the moment in a surreal glow. They were smiling, the familiar, comforting smile that you had come to know so well—one that could normally bring you peace. But now, the sight of them there, standing in the doorway while Spencer sat on your couch, made your heart plummet.

“Hey, babe,” Noa’s voice was light and warm as they shrugged off their jacket, the smile still on their face, though it faltered slightly when they saw Spencer sitting in the living room. “Who’s this?”

Your throat tightened, your mouth suddenly dry, and you felt your voice catch as you tried to find the words to explain, to introduce, to do anything that made sense.

Spencer, too, had gone completely still, his face pale, as if the reality of your life without him had hit all at once. This was the moment he hadn’t prepared for, the part of your life that he didn’t fit into, and it was staring him straight in the face.

“Hey, baby,” you said, the words catching in your throat, but forcing them out with a smile that you hoped looked normal, even as you felt Spencer flinch beside you. He knew that phrase all too well—the way you’d say it when you greeted him after a long day, the warmth and comfort that came with it. But now it was meant for someone else, and the reality of that cut through him like a knife.

Noa’s eyes darted between the two of you, clearly trying to make sense of the situation, their smile wavering. “This is Spencer,” you continued, trying to keep your voice steady, trying to make the introduction sound casual, like this wasn’t a huge, life-altering moment. “Um, he’s an old friend. He was in the neighborhood and... stopped by.”

You hated the way the lie sat on your tongue, the way it felt so heavy, so wrong. But what choice did you have? How were you supposed to explain who Spencer was to you—what he was to you? Especially now, when everything was in chaos and your heart felt like it was being split in two. So, you forced yourself to smile, to make it seem like there was nothing more to it than a surprise visit from someone you used to know.

Noa’s face softened a bit, their guard dropping as they took a step closer, holding out a hand to Spencer. “Oh, nice to meet you,” they said kindly, their eyes gentle and curious. “I’ve heard a lot about Y/N’s friends from back in the day, but I don’t think your name ever came up.”

Spencer managed a tight smile, shaking Noa’s hand as he fought to steady himself. “Yeah, it’s... nice to meet you too,” he said, his voice quieter than usual, the discomfort and awkwardness bleeding into every word. It was all so surreal, so painfully normal on the surface when everything underneath was chaos.

Noa looked between the two of you again, oblivious to the tension, and then smiled wider, turning their attention back to you. “I picked up takeout from that place you love on 5th. Figured we could have a low-key night in.”

“Yeah,” you nodded quickly, trying to swallow down the lump in your throat. “That sounds perfect. Really... perfect.”

Noa’s hand slipped around your waist, and you could feel Spencer's eyes burning into you, the unspoken words swirling around all of you like a storm. You knew you had to get him out of here—this wasn’t the time, and now was definitely not the place for whatever this was.

“Actually, um, Spencer was just leaving,” you said quickly, turning to him with pleading eyes. “Right, Spence?”

He looked at you, his expression unreadable, so many emotions passing through his eyes that it made you dizzy. But finally, he nodded, standing up slowly, the movement heavy with everything left unsaid. “Yeah... right. It was, um... nice seeing you, Y/N. Thanks for the tea.”

“Nonsense,” Noa cut in with a laugh, and you felt your stomach sink. “Join us,” they insisted, their voice warm and friendly as always. “I got enough for leftovers, but we’re fine with sharing, right, Y/N?” They gave you a light squeeze around your waist, completely unaware of the tension in the room, or the storm that had just been brewing moments before.

You felt your throat close up, the air around you becoming thin as panic gripped you. This was not supposed to happen—Spencer wasn’t supposed to stay, wasn’t supposed to be a part of this cozy, intimate meal with you and Noa. Your lives had already diverged, the gap too wide to bring together in a setting like this.

“Uh...” you started, your voice wavering, trying to find a way out of this without raising suspicion. But Noa’s hand was on your back, rubbing comforting circles, and they were looking at Spencer with nothing but open hospitality in their eyes.

“Come on, the more the merrier,” Noa urged, already turning to set their bags down on the counter, oblivious to the pleading look you gave Spencer.

Spencer’s face twisted with hesitation. He looked at you, then back at Noa, clearly torn between what he wanted and what he knew was best. “Really, I don’t want to intrude. I just... came to say hi.” His voice was small, and the vulnerability in it broke your heart all over again.

“No intrusion at all,” Noa said, already moving to unpack the takeout, arranging it on the table with a careless ease that made the whole situation seem almost normal. “I insist. Besides, you came all the way here. At least let us feed you before you head back.”

You felt a lump forming in your throat, the pressure of everything unsaid building up to a point you could barely contain. You could see the strain on Spencer’s face, the conflict in his eyes as he glanced between you and Noa. He didn’t want to be here, and you didn’t want him here either—not like this, not when it felt like every word spoken was laden with a secret.

But Noa’s smile was so open, so genuine, and your fiancé was already pulling plates out of the cabinet, laying them out for the three of you. You didn’t have it in you to make a scene, to start an argument you didn’t know how to finish.

“Spence... please, stay.” The words felt foreign as they left your mouth, and you hoped the slight tremor in your voice wasn’t noticeable. Noa didn't seem to pick up on it, too focused on setting the table and serving the food, but Spencer’s eyes caught yours, and you could see the depth of confusion and pain swimming behind them.

After a long moment, he gave a reluctant nod, sitting back down on the couch, his movements stiff and uneasy. “Okay... yeah, sure,” he said, forcing a polite smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “I’ll stay.”

“Great!” Noa’s voice was bright and full of excitement as they motioned for you both to come to the table. “Let's eat.” They sat down, already starting to pass out food, while you and Spencer found seats across from each other.

The table felt small, impossibly so, as if there was no space for all the emotions crammed into the room. And as the three of you sat down to eat, your mind raced, wondering how you were supposed to navigate this impossible dinner, with the man you once loved—and maybe still loved—sitting across from you, and the person you were supposed to marry right by your side.

“So, Spencer,” Noa began as they served out portions of food onto each plate, completely oblivious to the tension coiled like a spring between you and Spencer. “How long have you and Y/N known each other?”

You nearly dropped your fork, your hand trembling as you pretended to focus on your plate. You couldn’t look at Spencer; you didn’t know what expression he’d have or what he might say. All you could do was silently will him to keep it vague, to stick to the basics and not let anything slip that could unravel everything.

Spencer cleared his throat, visibly uncomfortable as he shifted in his seat, poking at the food on his plate with his fork. “Uh… a while,” he said carefully, his voice steady but low. “We, um, met when I moved for college.”

“Yeah? That’s awesome!” Noa beamed, seemingly thrilled to learn more about your past. “What did you study, Spence?”

You winced at the nickname, one you’d used so many times before but now sounded wrong coming from someone else. You could see the way Spencer’s eyes flickered at the mention of it, but he smiled tightly, glancing over at you for the briefest second before looking back at Noa. “I, um, studied a few things. Math, engineering, some psychology…” He trailed off, clearly trying to keep it as bland as possible, but the tension in the air was palpable.

Noa continued, blissfully unaware of the underlying currents in the conversation. “Wow, that’s impressive! And you’re just in town for a visit? Or work?”

Spencer hesitated, the tip of his tongue darting out to wet his lips as he searched for a response that wouldn’t set off alarms. “Uh, just… passing through, actually. Thought I’d… catch up with Y/N while I was here,” he finally said, each word feeling carefully weighed, trying to sound nonchalant but unable to hide the slight tremor in his voice.

“That’s so nice,” Noa said warmly, looking between the two of you. “Y/N always talks about her old friends, but it’s great to finally meet one in person. I’m glad she keeps up with people from back then.”

You gave a tight, forced smile, your stomach churning as you felt like you were teetering on a knife’s edge. “Yeah, you know me, always staying in touch,” you said quickly, trying to steer the conversation away from Spencer, away from the past, away from everything that felt like a ticking time bomb ready to explode if prodded too much.

“So, how long are you staying?” Noa asked, turning their attention back to Spencer, still friendly and curious. You could feel your pulse pounding in your ears, hoping Spencer would take the hint and not make this any more complicated than it already was.

“Oh, not long,” he said, swallowing thickly. “Just a short trip.” He paused, glancing at you again, the weight of his gaze almost too much to bear. “I, um… didn’t plan on staying long.”

“That’s a shame,” Noa said, completely missing the tense undercurrent between you two. “It would’ve been nice to spend more time getting to know you. Seems like you two must have been pretty close back then.”

“Yeah… something like that,” Spencer said softly, his eyes drifting down to his plate, and you felt like you couldn’t breathe, every second of this conversation digging you deeper into a pit you weren’t sure how to get out of. You just prayed—silently, desperately—that Spencer would keep his words guarded and that Noa wouldn’t start connecting any dots you weren’t ready to explain.

“Y/N, sweetums, you’re being awfully quiet,” Noa teased with a playful nudge to your side, and you saw Spencer’s eyes flicker as he tried to mask a cringe at the pet name. You never liked that one; it felt odd to you, and Spencer could tell. But Noa had started calling you that long ago, and it was one of those things you’d grown used to.

You forced a smile, praying it looked genuine. “Just letting you and Spencer get to know each other,” you said, but your voice came out strained, barely holding up under the weight of the situation. You could feel your nerves fraying, as if every word that left your mouth was the wrong one.

Noa, still blissfully oblivious to the palpable tension, brightened with an idea. “Oh! Spencer, are you coming to the wedding?” they asked, and you felt your stomach twist in knots. You knew Spencer hadn’t RSVP’d, and you were terrified of how he would respond. You could see him falter for a moment, looking like a deer caught in headlights, and you quickly jumped in before things could get worse.

“Spencer works for the FBI,” you said, hoping your voice sounded casual, steady, anything other than what you were really feeling. “He said he’d come if he doesn’t have a case.” You looked at him meaningfully, praying he’d go along with it, hoping he wouldn’t take this opportunity to say something more revealing.

“Oh, wow!” Noa’s eyes lit up in admiration, turning to Spencer with genuine curiosity. “That’s incredible! We’ll save a spot for you just in case.”

“Uh… yeah, thanks,” Spencer mumbled, the awkwardness in his tone barely masked by the polite smile he forced onto his face.

Dinner went on like that—Noa doing most of the talking, you scrambling to keep things on track, and Spencer struggling to navigate every question without giving too much away. You couldn’t stop fidgeting, feeling like every minute was an hour as you tried to balance between keeping up appearances and making sure nothing slipped that would reveal the tangled web of your history.

Finally, after what felt like a lifetime, dinner ended. Noa, always the gracious host, brought out tea and ushered everyone to the living room. The three of you settled onto the couches, the warmth of the tea doing nothing to ease the tension in your body. You noticed how close Spencer was sitting to you, his knee almost touching yours, and how Noa, in contrast, seemed so relaxed, not sensing any of the chaos swirling beneath the surface.

“I should probably get going,” Spencer said suddenly, setting his cup down on the coffee table and pushing himself up from the couch. He looked between you and Noa, the tension clear on his face, the evening clearly wearing on him.

“Where are you staying?” Noa asked, genuinely curious. “Do you need a ride?” They sat up straighter, eager to be helpful, and you held your breath, knowing that Spencer likely didn’t have a plan—he rarely ever did.

Spencer hesitated, clearly trying to come up with a response. “Oh, um… I’m not sure. I, uh… hadn’t really thought that far.”

The silence stretched thin, your heart pounding as you prayed Noa wouldn’t say what you were terrified they would. But they did, without a second thought, without hesitation. “You can stay here!” they offered brightly, smiling at Spencer. “We have a guest room—it’s no trouble at all.”

Spencer froze, glancing over at you, his eyes wide with surprise. And you were sure yours mirrored the same panic. This was not part of the plan. You weren’t supposed to have him here, under the same roof. And yet, it was all happening too fast to stop it.

“Uh… that’s really generous, but I don’t want to intrude—” Spencer started, but Noa waved a hand dismissively.

“Please, it’s no trouble,” they insisted, their smile still warm and inviting. “You’re more than welcome to stay. Right, Y/N?” They looked to you for confirmation, and you could feel Spencer’s gaze on you, begging for an out.

“Yeah… of course,” you managed to choke out, your voice weak, betraying every emotion you were desperately trying to hide. “It’s, um, fine.”

And with that, Spencer was staying for the night, and you had no idea how you were going to get through it.

The three of you sat in the living room, forcing your way through some show on TV. But the tension in the air made it impossible to focus on anything other than the uneasy silence and the occasional awkward attempts at small talk. You laughed at all the wrong times, and every time your eyes met Spencer’s, you felt your stomach twist into knots. Noa, oblivious as ever, eventually declared they were ready to call it a night and headed to take their nightly shower.

You took the opportunity to help Spencer get settled in the guest room, your movements jerky and stiff, the weight of the day pressing down on you. He sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing the back of his neck as you pulled spare linens out of the closet. The silence hung heavy between you, every unspoken word echoing through the small room.

“I’m sorry,” Spencer whispered finally, his voice cracking slightly. “I didn’t plan any of this… obviously.”

“No shit,” you replied, your tone sharper than you intended, but it was impossible to hide the anger and frustration building up inside you. It felt like everything was spiraling out of control, and you didn’t know how to fix it.

Spencer hung his head, staring down at his hands. “I’ll leave tomorrow,” he said quietly, like he was admitting defeat.

“I know you will,” you murmured, the words hollow as you hugged yourself, arms crossed tightly around your torso as if that could hold everything together.

With nothing left to say, you left the room, and went to bed. But sleep eluded you, the feeling of Noa’s arms wrapped around you offering none of the comfort you desperately needed. Their touch felt so different from Spencer’s—where he’d been gentle, familiar, their embrace felt confining, and the sound of their breath on your neck was a steady reminder of all the ways it wasn’t him. It wasn’t supposed to be this way, and you felt the guilt flood through you for even comparing them.

Eventually, Noa must’ve felt you finally drift off, because when they woke in the early morning, they carefully slipped out of bed, planting a kiss on your forehead before heading down the hall to start their day. They hadn’t forgotten about Spencer staying over, but they didn’t expect to hear his voice so early in the morning.

“Penelope, what do I do?” Spencer’s voice was muffled through the guest room door, and Noa’s hand froze on the doorknob to the bathroom as they listened. “I told her I love her, and then before she could even tell me how she felt, her fiancé came home. It’s… it’s a mess.”

Noa’s blood ran cold, their stomach dropping as they tried to process the words. Their breath hitched, and they pressed their back against the wall, suddenly afraid to be seen. They knew they shouldn’t be listening, but they couldn’t stop now.

Penelope’s voice came through faintly from Spencer’s phone, but they couldn’t make out her response.

“No, they don’t know Y/N and I were married. She clearly hasn’t had the guts to tell them.” Spencer’s words came out raw, full of frustration and sadness.

The confession hit Noa like a freight train. Married? They felt the walls of the hallway close in on them, the realization that they had never known the full truth of your relationship with Spencer, the truth that you’d never shared. It made their mind spin, and they backed away from the door, desperate to escape the overwhelming emotions crashing over them.

Noa didn’t confront you then, didn’t barge into the guest room or demand an explanation. Instead, they made their way out of the house quietly, slipping out like a ghost. They moved through the motions of their morning like a zombie, their mind racing, heart aching with every step. They needed to be alone, to think, to understand what they had overheard. And they would talk to you, eventually—but only once Spencer was gone.

When you woke up to the sharp sound of your phone ringing, you felt like you were swimming up through murky water, the events of the day before crashing back to you all at once. You squinted at the screen—it was Alexi, their name flashing insistently. You didn’t need to answer to know they’d be demanding an explanation for yesterday’s abrupt hang-up.

“Hey,” you croaked out, voice heavy with sleep and emotion.

“What the hell happened?” Alexi’s voice was stern, a mix of worry and frustration. “You hang up on me, and then I don’t hear from you all night. Spill.”

You sighed, running a hand over your face as you leaned back into the pillows. “Spencer showed up at my door yesterday… unannounced. He’s… he stayed the night,” you admitted, your voice cracking.

Alexi’s reaction was immediate. “He what? Y/N, what is going on?”

You spilled everything—how Spencer had flown out to see you, how Noa had unknowingly invited him to stay, how you’d spent the whole night on edge, and how every touch, every word, every look seemed to tear at your carefully built life. Your voice wavered as you confessed how hard it had been, the emotions you’d buried for years bubbling back to the surface in a way you couldn’t control.

“Okay,” Alexi’s voice softened. “So… do you still love him?”

The question hung in the air like a challenge, and you felt your breath hitch as a tear slipped down your cheek. You’d spent so long avoiding the answer to that question, convincing yourself that everything had changed, that you’d moved on. But when you finally spoke, it felt like the words had been buried for years, clawing their way out.

“I think I do,” you whispered through the tears, your voice trembling. “It’s like… being with Noa was always so easy, you know? I never had to compare the two. But seeing them together… talking to Spencer again… I see how much love he still holds for me, and I know I’ll never be able to give Noa that. I can’t… I can’t love them the way I loved Spencer.”

Alexi was silent on the other end, and you could hear them carefully thinking over their response, searching for the right thing to say. But before they could get a word out, you gasped, cutting them off mid-thought.

“I gotta go,” you said in a rush, sitting up so quickly that the room spun around you.

“What? No—Y/N, you can’t just hang up again! What is going on—?”

“Spencer,” you breathed, staring wide-eyed at the doorway. He was standing there, framed in the early morning light, his expression one of utter disbelief, and you knew instantly that he’d heard every word you’d just said.

“Do you mean that?” he asked, stepping into the room with slow, careful movements like he was approaching a fragile creature. His voice was so quiet, so vulnerable, you felt like it was wrapping around your heart and squeezing. “You still love me?”

You couldn’t speak, couldn’t breathe. All you could do was sit there, your phone slipping from your fingers as you met his gaze, your heart pounding like it would break free from your chest. And you knew, in that moment, there was no more hiding, no more pretending that everything was fine. It was just you and Spencer, standing on the precipice of everything you’d left unsaid.

“Yes,” you whispered, voice cracking as tears welled in your eyes.

Spencer felt his own tears begin to blur his vision, his breath catching in his throat. “I love you too,” he said, the words spilling out like they’d been buried for years, his voice thick with emotion.

You let out a wet giggle through your own tears, and before you knew it, Spencer was sitting on the bed next to you, his hands reaching out to clasp yours. The warmth of his touch was comforting, familiar, and for a moment it felt like all those years apart had never happened. The weight of everything you’d both been holding in pressed down, making this moment both heartbreaking and hopeful.

“Can we… can we try again?” he asked, his voice hopeful, eyes searching yours as if waiting for a lifeline.

You shook your head, sniffling softly. “I’m still engaged, Spencer.”

His face fell slightly, but he stayed close, not letting go of your hands. “You just said you’ll never love them like you loved me.”

“I know,” you admitted, your voice a fragile whisper. “And it’s true… but I still have to talk to them, figure out what to do.”

Spencer nodded slowly, his thumb brushing softly over your knuckles, grounding himself in the contact. “Do you… do you want to be with me?” he asked, voice trembling with the fear and hope of what your answer might be.

You stared into those beautiful, familiar eyes, the ones that once held your world, the ones you thought you’d never see again. “I think so,” you whispered, the words barely escaping your lips. “But, Spencer, I have my whole life here now. More so than ever… and you, you have a life in Virginia.”

“I don’t care,” he said with finality, his voice strong and certain, all doubt gone. “I don’t care, I will go anywhere to be with you. No job is more important than you.”

“Spence…” you murmured, your heart torn between what was and what could be, feeling the pull to him so strong it almost hurt.

“Sweetums,” he teased, the familiar grin spreading across his face, a flicker of the boyish charm you remembered.

“Too soon,” you laughed, shaking your head, but the sound of his voice, the way he said it, made it impossible to hold back the smile tugging at your lips. Even as your heart wrestled with the enormity of the moment, the warmth of Spencer’s presence wrapped around you like a comfort you never wanted to let go.

True to his word, Spencer left that morning, but he didn’t go back to Virginia. Instead, he checked into a hotel nearby, giving you the space he knew you needed while not quite ready to leave you behind.

When you finally heard the jingle of Noa’s keys in the door that evening, your stomach twisted with nerves. You had spent the entire day pacing, replaying the conversation with Spencer in your head, wondering what you would say to Noa, trying to untangle what you really wanted.

“Hey, baby,” You called, your tone neutral as they entered, hanging up their bag.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were married?” Noa asked casually, turning to face you, their eyes sharp with an edge you hadn’t heard before.

“What?” you stammered, feeling like the wind had just been knocked out of you. “I didn’t—”

“To Spencer,” Noa clarified, cutting you off, their voice still eerily calm. “You know, the man that I invited to dinner, who I let stay the night. The man who I made an absolute fool out of myself in front of. The man who told you he’s still in love with you.”

You felt your throat tighten, words failing as the weight of Noa’s calm anger pressed down on you like a heavy stone. Noa had never yelled—they didn’t need to. The steady, even tone made every word land like a blow.

“I didn’t—I don’t…” You struggled to form a coherent thought, desperate to defend yourself, but the truth was right there, undeniable.

“Do you love him?” Noa asked, and for a moment, their voice cracked, the tears finally shining in their eyes.

“Yes,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

“Do you love me?” they pressed, and the desperation in their eyes broke your heart all over again.

“Yes,” you said again, your own tears falling freely.

Noa took a shuddering breath, looking at you like they were seeing you for the first time. “Do you want to get married?” they asked, and the question hung between you like a fragile thread.

You shook your head, your voice breaking as you whispered, “No.”

Noa nodded, silent tears streaming down their face, and the acceptance in their expression was devastating. “Well,” they said softly, swallowing hard as they looked away, their world—your world—crumbling with that single word.

“Noa, I’m sorry,” you said, your voice trembling as you took a tentative step closer, hoping to reach them somehow through the hurt.

Noa nodded, but the gesture was more resigned than understanding. “It’s… what are we going to do?” they asked, their voice thick with uncertainty.

“What?” you asked, your confusion breaking through the tension.

“The wedding,” they clarified, their words heavy with practical sadness. “We have people coming, we paid for everything, we have a house together.”

“Yeah…” you sighed, feeling the weight of all the things that needed to be undone. “You, um, you can keep the house. And I’ll pay you back for the wedding… somehow. I’ll figure it out. And, uh, I’ll send out the cancellations… this is all my fault.”

“It is,” Noa agreed bluntly, and the truth of it stung. “Was the whole relationship a lie?”

“No! God, no,” you panicked, reaching out as if the truth could stop the pain. “Everything was real, I… I didn’t realize I still loved Spencer until I saw him again.”

“That’s it?” Noa’s voice wavered between disbelief and bitterness. “One night, and you’re calling off a whole wedding?”

You sighed, the exhaustion of the situation weighing you down. “I know it’s crazy, but… I’ve already been divorced once. I don’t want to do that again.”

Noa let out a hollow laugh, and for a moment, you saw a glimmer of the person you’d spent years with, a flash of understanding in their eyes. “You’re already planning our divorce?”

The ridiculousness of the whole situation caught up to you both, and despite the pain, you found yourself laughing too—softly, helplessly—as the tension cracked just enough to let some humor seep in. “Maybe?” you offered with a weak smile.

You both laughed then, a bittersweet sound that hung in the air, and for a moment, it felt almost okay—like the world wasn’t falling apart around you. When the laughter faded, you looked at them, your voice soft and hesitant. “Are you… are you going to be okay?”

Noa paused, looking down at the floor before meeting your eyes again. “I mean, this sucks,” they said honestly, their voice raw. “But yeah, I’ll be okay.”

Noa was still possibly the best person you knew, even in the midst of everything falling apart. The two of you sat down together, canceling everything for the wedding, each phone call and email pulling at your heartstrings. But Noa was calm and patient, working through the logistics with you, getting deposits back where you could, dividing your shared assets. Luckily, the separate bank accounts made that part easier.

“What are you going to do now?” Noa asked one day, after you’d gone through another round of cancellations. “Are you moving?”

“I’m not sure,” you admitted, trying to mask the uncertainty. “I hear Virginia is lovely…” You know it is, you’ve visited many times.

Noa nodded slowly, a teasing scoff escaping through the lingering hurt. “Like, where the FBI is?”

“Is it?” you said with a laugh, playing innocent.

“And what about your stores?” they pressed, leaning back as if to put some distance between the weight of the question and the reality of your situation.

You groaned, the stress of it all hitting you at once. “I don’t know… I could sell them? Then give you the money for the wedding.”

Noa laughed softly, elbowing you gently in the ribs. “Y/N, you don’t have to pay for the whole wedding—just, like, ¾ of it.”

You couldn’t help but laugh along with them, grateful for how easy they were making this break. “Okay, deal,” you agreed, grinning through the heaviness. “Maybe Alexi would want to take over.”

That night, you called Alexi, filling them in on everything—Spencer, Noa, the wedding, the whole mess you were working through. They listened patiently, and when you finally finished, they couldn’t hold back their excitement.

“I knew it!” Alexi practically shouted, causing you to laugh, the tension melting away as you shared the absurdity of your current situation with them. After laughing and joking together for a while, you brought up the idea of selling your business. To your relief and surprise, Alexi was more than willing to buy it from you, excited at the opportunity. And just like that, another piece of your life clicked into place as you prepared to move forward.

While all of this was going on, Spencer paced his hotel room like a caged animal. He couldn’t sit still, couldn’t concentrate on anything except the racing thoughts of what could happen—what your decision would be. His phone sat untouched, and though his fingers itched to call someone for support, he was too scared to share any good news before knowing the final verdict. He couldn’t let hope take root, not yet.

The hours dragged on until, late at night, his phone buzzed loudly in the quiet room, lighting up with your contact photo—the one he had never changed, with that adorable smile he couldn’t forget. His heart leapt into his throat as he scrambled to answer, pressing the phone to his ear urgently.

“Hello?” he asked, trying to steady his voice, but the anxious excitement was impossible to hide.

“Hey,” you breathed out, the sound of your voice washing over him like a wave of relief.

“How’d it go?” Spencer’s voice trembled with hope, his nerves hanging on every word.

“Good… good,” you said, and he could hear the faint smile in your voice, something lighter than he’d heard in days. “Um, remember when I visited a while back? And we saw that beautiful red house with the flowers out front?”

“Yeah?” he replied, holding his breath, his mind racing to piece together what you were saying.

“Should we see if it’s on the market?”

Spencer’s chest tightened with joy, and for a moment, the world stood still—just the possibility of a future, of a home, of everything he’d ever wanted with you.

—

“Spencer!” Derek yelled from down the hall, wiping his hands on a rag after finishing up some work.

“Yeah?” Spencer poked his head in the door, dust smudged on his face from their hours of labor on the house.

“I finished this room,” Derek said, gesturing to the newly painted walls and freshly installed trim. “Which one’s next?”

“Let me check,” Spencer said, ducking out for a second before coming back with a checklist. “Bathroom.”

Derek grinned, wiping his forehead. “Y/N’s really calling all the shots, huh?” he teased.

Spencer’s smile softened, his eyes reflecting nothing but warmth. “This is her dream home.”

“What about your dream home?” Derek asked, eyebrow raised.

“She’s my dream home,” Spencer said simply, the words carrying a sincerity that Derek couldn’t help but appreciate.

“That’s sweet, man,” Derek said, clapping Spencer on the shoulder with a smile. “But I’m never letting you live that down.”

Spencer chuckled, shaking his head as he picked up a paint roller, knowing full well Derek meant every word. And that was fine with him—because this was where he wanted to be, building a life with you, step by step.

“Spencer!” you called out urgently from the other side of the house, your voice ringing through the hallways.

Spencer’s heart skipped a beat as he rushed over, worried you might have hurt yourself. “Yeah, baby? Everything okay?” he asked breathlessly as he rounded the corner to find you standing by the bedroom window.

You turned to him with a playful smile, holding up two curtain swatches. “Which curtain do you like?”

Spencer let out a relieved chuckle, shaking his head at his own worry. He walked over to you, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Whatever color you pick will be perfect, my love,” he murmured against your skin.

“Well, obviously I have the final say,” you teased with a grin, “but I still wanted to know what you like.”

“Thank you for considering my opinion,” he laughed, looking thoughtfully at the swatches. “Uh… that one,” he said, pointing to the one in your left hand.

“Thank you! Correct choice,” you teased, dropping the swatches on the floor as you grabbed Spencer’s shirt, pulling him close for a deep, lingering kiss.

He hummed softly against your lips, smiling into the kiss. “Mmm… what was that for?”

You broke the kiss just enough to whisper, “I just love you.”

“Yeah?” Spencer asked with a soft smile, eyes twinkling with mischief. “Enough to marry me again?”

You laughed, caught off guard by the sudden question. “Was that your proposal?” you teased, raising an eyebrow playfully.

Spencer leaned back, pretending to consider his words thoughtfully before nodding with a chuckle. “I think it was,” he admitted, laughing at himself. “So… how’d I do?”

Giggling, you pulled him in for another kiss, your lips meeting his with warmth and certainty. “Amazing. But we’re eloping this time,” you said, resting your forehead against his as the words slipped out between kisses.

“Whatever you say, Mrs. Reid,” he murmured back, his voice full of affection and promise.

—

After months of hard work, the renovations on your new house were finally finished. It had taken time, effort, and a lot of patience, but with Derek’s hands-on help and guidance, you and Spencer transformed it into a home that truly reflected both of you.

The front of the house, a charming red structure framed by an explosion of colorful flowers, felt like something straight out of a storybook. A mix of vibrant yellows, pinks, purples, and reds surrounded the quaint porch, and the white picket fence added a classic touch, making the entire exterior feel warm and inviting.

Inside, the home had become a true sanctuary. Your bedroom was bright and serene, with airy, light-filtering curtains draped over wide windows that bathed the room in soft, natural light. The bed was draped in a red and white blanket that matched the cheerful energy of the house, and shelves lined with books and little mementos from your life with Spencer filled the walls.

The kitchen was a dream—a beautiful, open area filled with pale blue cabinets and golden fixtures that glinted under the soft morning light that poured through the wide, farmhouse-style windows. Wooden open shelves displayed dishes and decor, and the island in the center was the perfect place for shared meals, morning coffee, and cooking side-by-side, something that you and Spencer cherished.

Spencer’s office was a space of calm concentration, tucked into a corner of the house that offered peace and quiet. The walls were painted a deep forest green, and vintage touches—like the rustic wooden desk and traditional-style chair—gave it a classic, studious feel. The large windows allowed in just enough natural light to make it a comfortable, thoughtful workspace, while the thick greenery just outside provided a sense of privacy and focus.

After the renovations were done, you and Spencer knew there was no better way to celebrate than to invite all your closest friends and family for a “housewarming” party. The BAU team, your parents, Alexi, and a few other close friends gathered at the house to tour the renovations, see all the changes, and share in the excitement of your new beginning. Laughter filled the rooms as everyone admired the work you’d both put into the home and marveled at the way it reflected both of you so perfectly.

But the tour was just the beginning. As everyone made their way to the backyard, the sun started to dip below the horizon, the sky turning into the golden hour glow of soft oranges and pinks. The moment felt magical, and you knew it was time to share your real surprise.

You stood beside Spencer, a wide smile on your face as you addressed your loved ones, your voice carrying across the yard. “We’re so happy that you all could come to celebrate our home with us,” you started, your eyes twinkling as you looked to Spencer. “But, actually, that’s not the only reason we asked you all to be here today.”

There were murmurs of curiosity and excitement, eyes darting between you and Spencer as he took your hand. “This is our version of eloping,” he announced, his voice warm and steady, and there was a collective gasp from the crowd as they began to realize what was happening.

“We’re getting married,” you added, barely able to keep from bursting into laughter and tears all at once. And as you turned to Noa—your now close friend and recently ordained officiant—you saw the beaming smile on their face as they stepped forward to take their place at the center of the garden, ready to join you and Spencer in marriage once again, this time surrounded by the people who meant the most to you both.

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slytherinshua · 2 months ago

Text

BOY DAD INTAK

genre. fluff. headcanons. non-idol au but music-related/piwon related stuff is still mentioned!! warnings. pregnancy/parent/baby stuff. sooo messy i'm very sorry abt that. not proofread. pairing. husband!intak x fem!reader. wc. 1.1k. request. for @blue-jisungs <33 a/n. i wanted to finish this quickly esp with everything going on just so maybe u have smth to distract urself axe ☹️☹️☹️ i love u so much <33 net. @kstrucknet

When he finds out you’re pregnant he’s honestly so shocked

But a good shocked of course

Safe to say it wasn’t entirely planned sjdksjs

You’re both still very young but even though it was unexpected Intak is ready to be a dad and super excited for it :(

He’s the best at taking care of you during your pregnancy

He always was when you were dating but he takes extra steps to make sure all your needs are met

He will always make sure you have whatever food you’re craving

Plus he’s down to try the weird combinations as well

More often than not they taste terrible to him while you’re chowing down

But he finds it endearing

He’ll watch you eat from across the table with his head rested on his fist and a smile on his face

He keeps track of what meds you should be taking and reminds you when you forget

Although his work can keep him busy sometimes, he’d drop everything for you if you needed it

He will always always make it to your appointments

Just because he’s not the one growing the baby doesn’t mean he can skip out on any of the steps— it’s his child as well after all

And he makes sure to always answer his phone and check his texts even if you’re updating him about your day he’ll take the time to text you back

He doesn’t announce that you’re pregnant to the other members until you’re well along in your second trimester

But it’s met with excitement from everyone

Probably a look from Keeho and a throwaway “aren’t y’all still young?”

But he’s over the moon excited to be an uncle trust he’s going to be present in the baby’s life

Theo would gift you all the practical things you could need like diapers, monitors, and bottles

Once the baby arrives Jiung will probably meal prep some food for both of you (which you are forever grateful for)

Soul finds the most interesting baby toys on the market but despite Intak’s slight judgemental look when he receives them, you think they’re all great

Jongseob is fully composing lullaby and nursery rhymes, except you’re a little unsure of how easy they are to follow once he throws in complicated rap rhythms

Keeho’s proud of Intak and excited for you— he knows you’ll be the best parents

But as the leader, he’s also more than eager to help out wherever you need it, especially with cleaning or just little things to help you destress when you need it, mainly during postpartum :’)

Intak is extra clingy while you’re pregnant, especially when your bump starts to show

Even if it’s only been a few days since it was visible, he is all over you

You probably receive a million kisses a day, and trust his arms are always wrapped around your waist, feeling your bump with that proud dad smile on his face

Always says his son is gonna have the coolest dad ever, and you can’t even argue with him because you do think Intak is gonna be the coolest dad ever

And when your son arrives, Intak couldn’t be prouder

Definitely cries holding him for the first time, and is probably very emotional the first couple of days

But he is also your biggest support

He’s doing absolutely everything he can to make sure you can rest after delivery; seriously won’t let you lift even a finger

He shows you off even more than before, he just thinks you’re so incredible and amazing for everything you’re capable of, and how good of a mom you are

He’s more in love with you than ever

Each milestone your son reaches is so important to Intak, from his first smile, to his first word (which he’s proud to say was “dada”), to his first steps and first day of school

Intak is one of those dads who is constantly giving all his friends and family updates about your little ones and sharing cute moments of his son with him

He’s so close with his son, and you’re always happy to see them spending time together

Of course, he’s gonna raise his son right!!

From an early age, he’s always talking to his son about doing things for mom; whether it be cleaning the house cause you had a long day, planning a surprise date cause it’s been a while, or buying you flowers because it’s mother’s day

Doesn’t matter if your son can’t even talk yet, Intak will still be talking about every occasion that is important to you

And they plan all the special things together <3

Dressed up in matching suits for your first mother’s day, and your heart melted :(

Intak includes your son in everything, and they just make the best duo, you couldn’t be happier to have them in your life

Date nights with Intak used to be a super regular thing in your early marriage, but it becomes pretty tricky with a kid to manage

You rely on Intak’s friends to babysit a lot, especially Keeho and Theo who are more than happy to compete for best uncle award

You can usually sneak in at least 3 dates per month amidst your busy schedule <3

Intak is the best person ever to comfort his son and also to give the best advice

He’ll always wipe his tears and assure him whenever he stumbles, especially as a toddler/little kid around 2-6

He’s always telling his son how proud he is of him and how he can do anything he ever wants to and be backed by his dad

As your son grows older, Intak gets a bit more emotional about it

Because he’s not as small and dependent as he used to be :(

Especially at around age 5-6, he’s really getting out of his shell, and Intak feels bittersweet about it

Of course, he’s beyond proud of his son for making new friends and trying out new things by himself with the introduction of school

But he also misses those more quiet days when it was just you two and your baby doing everything together :(

Your son starts to develop some of Intak’s habits, and you find it so cute how he’s becoming a little carbon copy of his dad

They share the same interests and can always be found playing together

Definitely starts enjoying music with his son really early on and is always dancing and singing/rapping with his kiddo <3

And also loves to get into sports with his son and compete (although he’ll almost always let his son win)

You find it incredible how they can stay entertained together for hours

Of course, Intak doesn’t have endless energy like his son does, but he still somehow keeps up just running off of love and pride for his kid

Best boy dad you could ever ask for !!!

↳ p1harmony taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @eternalgyu,, @kangtaehyunzzz,, @amara-mars,, @nyukyusnz,, @blossominghunnie,,

@wccycc,, @seunghancore,, @sobun1est,, @bananabubble,, @talkingsaxy,,

@cupidslovearrows,, @50-husbands,, @hursheys,, @mjupis,, @stannwjnss,,

@gong-fourz,, @forever-atiny

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m0chis-cafe · 2 months ago

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Hello! This is my first time making a request, if it's okay, can I get a reader with Lillia, Rook, Vil and Leona who has recently been suffering from insomnia and anxiety about returning home (comfort in the end) Please? 😔🎀

i absolutely love this, i get horrible insomia. i gotchu♡

(edit: i ended up focusing on one more than the other in some, but both are mentioned. hope u still like it *mwah*)

reader suffering from insomnia and anxiety about returning home.. ⋆⑅˚₊

word count: 1.5k

warnings: mentioning of anxiety, and panic attacks (there will be major comfort though), sitting in laps, kissing, joking to help, mentioning of what happens in each of the characters books (i hope yall have read em before but js in case)

characters: leona, rook, vil, and lilia

leona kingscholar🦁

you paced the botanical gardens on campus, hands tangling in your hair s you thoughts went a million miles a second..

how am i going to get home?

how is my family.. god i miss them..

if im forced to stay here.. how do i even pass these crazy magic classes?

do the people here ive come to know even want me here or are they forced to cause i cant leave..

every new thought was another anxiety that just caused your breath to quicken. your thoughts were flooded with negatives.. if you had magic this is what youd assume a magic blot would feel like.. so much negative emotions piling into you all at once.

you eventually sat below a tree, knees curled to your chest as you tried to calm yourself down. it didnt help that you hadent slept in days, insomnia only getting worse since coming to nightraven.

yet no matter what you did your breaths wouldnt calm, your hands kept shaking, and you couldnt hear or see straight. you almost jumped right out of your skin as you felt hands grab your own that covered your face. looking up you saw brown hair and ears.. leona?

his voice made its way to you eventually, "herbavore? herbavore.. seriously c'mon your worrying me. ruggie said you ran off but i didnt think itd be this bad." he mumbled to himself before his hands slipped dwon to your biceps, "hey, listen to me." he spoke firmly.

your eyes eventually meet him, your breaths calmling slightly at his presence. taking large breaths through your lips as you looked up at him, arms shaking in his hold. "dont fall out on me now, we need you." he spoke lowly as he scopped you up with ease, placing you betwen his legs, "your alright now herbivore, whatevers going on in that head of yours, its gonna be alright, yea?" he placed a kiss on your forhead allowng you time to breath normally.

when your breaths calmed and body began to calm, you sighed and leaned more into his body, "thank you.. leona". he chuckled deeply, sloching more down the tree, letting you fall into his chest. "its fine kid, just glad your fine. did something happen?". your eyes widened before spilling, explaining your thoughts to him slowly, anxious to be a burden. when you ended he rolled his eyes and strted laughing.. at you?..

huh?

"you seriously think anyone here doesnt want you here? i think at this point those first years would fall apart without you, and as for finding your way home, crawley better. or ill personally kick his ass, alright herbavore?" you simply nodded your head and leaned into him smiling, "your really not as bad as they say you are.."

vil schoenheit🧺

vi had become obsessed with training for the dance competittion, day after day everyone was practicing for hours every day. you tried to be nothin bt supportive but your insomnia had only gotten worse with the recent stress of the compettition..

what will happen if we dont win?

everyone else looks so tired..

god im so tired.. when was the last time i slept multiple hours?

i wish i could just go home already..

you guys had gotten the first brea of the day, you sat against the wall between kalim and ace as they yapped about how excited they were to preform next week. listening to them had you distracted, your eyes fluttering closed.

a hand was placed on your shoulder, looking up you saw jamil crouched in front of you, "are you alright? you look terrible prefect" you heard ace and kalim repremand him for being so blunt, but you just shook your head trying to wake up, "im fine jamil.. just tired, thank you though"

he looked skeptical but quickly turned to make sure kalim was drinking water and taking a proper break. ace mumbled something under his breath that you barley couldnt catch before he stood up and walked towards vil who was with rook and epel, who were talking across the room.

you saw vil look down at ace with his arms crossed, he glanced at you as ace pointed a finger to you. vil abandoned his conversation with epel and rook, shooing away the others around you, "why wouldnt you say that you havent been sleeping, thats not proper conditions for you to be proforming in prefect."

"im fine vil-", he rolled his eyes and cut you off, "you look anything but, stand" he reached a hand down to you, pulling you up from the ground. your head swam with spots when you rose too quickly, stumbling into vil.

he wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you up, "poision.. is somethng truley wrong?" you looked up at him, eyes wide as he read you like a book. he quickly took your hand and dragged you out of the practice room and into the lounge at pomefiore.

he sat you down in one of the chairs and crouched in fron tof you, holding your face in his hands, "speak to me.." you sighed before explaining what had been happening, the stresses and not sleeping, the thoughts of never being able to go home.

he sighed and stood, sitting beside you and tugging you into his side, "i wish you would speak up when this happens, you know that id never wish to add to your burdens." he placed a kiss to your forhead before continuing, "we will find a way for you to go home, no matter how bitter sweet itll be, i do hope we find a way for you to go back and forth.. we would all miss you terribly here.. especially me." at his words you sighed and relaxed into his side, "ill find a way back, i could never just leave you guys.. especially you.

rook hunt🪶

you thought itd be easy to hide your emotions recently, but knowing rook he proably could already see through your mind..

i hope i can go home soon..

i wonder if time has passed back home and if my family is worried about me..

i need to stop stresing, i havent slept at all recently

these magic classes are getting harder with the lack of magic

you thought you kept a pretty good mask on arround others, yet as soon as you were walking from potions alone with rook he spoke up, "mon cheri.. have you been sleeping enough? your beauty is as blinding as always, alas you seem more tired than usual."

you shouldve known better than to try to keep something from him, he finds out everything sooner rathar than latter, "im alright, just worried about getting home, i guess its been affecting my sleep.."

"well theres no use in worrying cheri! i garuntee they will find a way to send you home! with that said i think a long rest for you is in place." he spoke cherfully as he laced your hands together and dragged you to pomefiore, you smiled at his actions and followed along.. he always here to look after me

lilia vanrough🦇

after dealing with blots from every other house, you thought hanging around diasmonia would be calming. yet as you sat in the lounge with silver, sebek, lilia, and malleus your thought still didnt stop running..

whos going to over-blot next?

will the next one be more powerful.. maybe too powerful..

i didnt have these struggles at home

even my sleep scheduals gotten worse.. late nights staying up with lilia and idia playing games have become much more often an occurance

im supposed to be relaxing, just breath..

your mind spaced out as you looked at the floor in front of you while stuck in thought. your hands tangled into your blazer sleeves as your breath quickened, your vision began to see spots before you felt a hand rest on top of your own in your lap.

"prefect, is something the matter?" your head snapped up and saw lilia who was sat beside you, a concerned look for once took over his boyish grin, "your not looking too good.. are you ill?" he placed a hand on you forhead attempting to asses if you were running a fever.

"im alright.. just missing home" you mumbled, offering him a small smile as you placed your head on his shoulder. he sighed, raisng your hand to press a kiss on the back of your hand, "well find a way for you to go back, i promise it my dear."

he wrapped an arm around your waist pulling you to lean more into him, "in the mean time, you havent been sleeping and its clear, get some rest prefect" his boyish grin returned as he pecked your cheek. he was right.. everything was gonna be ok.

you finally felt comfortble enough to fall into a deep sleep against him, with grim curled up into your lap mumbling about his dreams of tuna. surronded by people you became found of over you stay at nightraven, it wouldnt be bad to stay here, but you knew that there would be a way home.

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #leona kingscholar #leona x reader #leona kingsholar x reader #vil schoenheit #vil x reader #vil schoenheit x reader #rook hunt #rook x reader #rook hunt x reader #lilia vanrouge #lilia x reader #lilia vanrouge x reader #mochiscafe<3

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elysiansparadise · 4 months ago

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Saturn in the Composite Chart

══🤍 Saturn in Aries 🤍══

In this relationship there is a strong conviction to be with the other. Both people can be very hard on themselves, even having a couple of insecurities and doubts about whether or not they are enough. You will learn to have greater confidence in yourself and the other can give you that push to dare to do things that you had never thought or considered. They will not be afraid to directly address any differences that exist and will avoid running away or evading problems, preferring to seek and find solutions that work for both of them.

══🤍Saturn in Taurus 🤍══

This couple will work hard to gradually build an environment of comfort and security for each other, as it is something they long for in this relationship. They will seek to maintain harmony despite the issues that may arise. Both can be very patient with each other and will seek to understand each other so that both can feel truly appreciated in the relationship. They may have a wound from not having felt valued in previous relationships, so they will do everything possible to avoid both feeling that way themselves and making others feel that way.

══🤍Saturn in Gemini 🤍══

At first there may be some difficulty in expressing oneself with the other [either due to fears or insecurities], however this placement tells us that over time both can create clear and direct communication about both what they think and what they feel. Sometimes they may have a tendency to avoid certain topics for fear of causing discomfort if they consider it something very personal for the other and they may prefer that the other person take the first step. They both want to teach the other significant things about the relationship, that it is okay to speak their minds, that they will be listened to or even appreciated for giving their opinions.

══🤍Saturn in Cancer 🤍══

They may have issues with being vulnerable or allowing themselves to be very emotionally open, however, in this relationship they will greatly appreciate each other's attempts to do so, as they know how difficult it is. There is a tendency to care for and protect each other, creating a safe and welcoming environment. They can take their emotions and those of others very seriously and it is sometimes necessary that they take care of their words, as they can easily feel hurt, something that can be worked on by creating and establishing boundaries.

══🤍Saturn in Leo 🤍══

Both may have issues with feeling accepted as they are, in this relationship both will support each other to be themselves without fear of judgment. Throughout this relationship, both will mature a lot and can encourage the other to let go of the opinions of others to feel valued. Both can be somewhat proud, which if not regulated can cause issues or arguments. They may fear being judged by the other, which must be worked on with open communication. Being a fixed sign, Saturn in this sign makes this a loyal and constant partner in terms of dedication and appreciation.

══🤍Saturn in Virgo 🤍══

Both tend to put very high expectations on themselves and want to solve everything on their own. In this relationship, they will learn over time to rely on others, what it means to have a partner who supports you as much as you support them. Both are oriented towards improvement, either constantly working on themselves or seeking to improve the relationship and its quality. Both can seek the best version of themselves for the relationship which leads them to set very high standards for themselves. They need to know that they do not need to strive for perfection, rather for stability.

══🤍Saturn in Libra 🤍══

It is very likely that before the relationship or outside of it, both are very self-sufficient and have a hard time relying on others. This relationship will teach them to cooperate, to open up and rely on another person. This relationship promises to be a long-lasting relationship in which both can balance the responsibilities of the relationship and will make decisions together. They will give what they receive from the other. They can choose to deal with their differences privately and resolve it in a way that is fair to both of them. Both will become deeply committed to the relationship.

══🤍Saturn in Scorpio 🤍══

They will be able to handle crises very well and stay strong no matter what. With each other you will not only learn to trust someone but you will also feel that you can explore your most tense emotions with each other and not feel judged for it. They can handle the most difficult emotions very well, being empathetic and understanding of the other. They have a natural tendency to be distrustful and show a strong and unwavering appearance, but they will see themselves in their rawest moments and seek to be with the other through them.

══🤍Saturn in Sagittarius 🤍══

Both will place a lot of importance on the idea of exploring and getting to know each other deeply, as a way to have the stability and relationship they want. They will give a lot of priority to explaining to the other what they truly value in a relationship, as well as listening to what the other values. They will want to explore a lot with each other and will put a lot of emphasis on living moments that bring important teachings to both of them. This relationship will have a focus on honesty, integrity and justice.

══🤍Saturn in Capricorn 🤍══

They are focused on creating a stable and lasting relationship based on common values and similar goals. They are both very ambitious and will be fascinated by the fact that the other also has goals for which they strive and work hard. They may be used to carrying many things on their shoulders and keeping their feelings to themselves, especially those that make them feel weak. In this relationship, both will learn not to pretend to be able to handle everything, they will find in each other a stable pillar to lean on when things become difficult.

══🤍Saturn in Aquarius 🤍══

They seek to avoid at all costs controlling the other person or limiting them in some way, because they would never do something that they hate being done to them. A lot of support for the other when going after what they aspire to, a strong bond of companionship where there is support and appreciation. They both empower the other and encourage them to be authentic and independent. They are both self-sufficient and will need a lot of their own space and time alone, but that doesn't mean they don't love each other. The perspectives they had on relationships will change a lot, especially those in the long term.

══🤍Saturn in Pisces 🤍══

This relationship can be very compassionate, with a focus on constantly and attentively caring for and supporting each other. They may have difficulty establishing limits, but they will be mutually supportive in doing so. There is a tendency for both of them not to be vulnerable or not seek help or attention from others, but in this relationship both can patiently show the other that it is okay to open up and admit when they are not okay. Together they will learn to face the issues that arise without running away or avoiding the topic. When the other feels lost or confused, the other will be there to be an anchor and a source of comfort and stability.

────────────────────✧────────────────────

═══🩶Saturn in the 1st house🩶═══

This is a serious relationship, where responsibility and maturity play a central role from the beginning. Both are clear about what they want from the relationship and will do their best to build a long-term relationship with each other. Both seek stability in the relationship and feel a mutual commitment that motivates them to work hard for the goals they have together. Devotion and a strong loyalty to each other and what they formed together. They can demand a lot of themselves in the relationship and both may feel that they aren't doing enough, so the love and support of the other is necessary, since they must know how to appreciate the efforts that they make. Both of you will be able to grow a lot with each other, you will become more introspective about who you are and who you want to be.

═══🩶Saturn in the 2nd house🩶═══

Being the house of what they value as a couple, Saturn here shows us a couple that values stability, reliability and that ability of both to be there for the other no matter what. They can be unbreakable and form a solid foundation of trust for the relationship. Both of you may have that need for security in the relationship, so it will be crucial that you talk about your insecurities to better understand each other. The relationship may have progressed slowly. They may have challenges talking about what they need, so patience and understanding will be necessary. They will not hesitate to work hard to achieve financial security, to establish common values in the relationship. Spending time with each other is of utmost importance for both of them, and precisely because they both value their time, they do not hesitate to give it to the other.

══🩶Saturn in the 3rd house🩶══

In this relationship, both can learn to think in the long term, they will become more mature and will be able to generate a realistic and practical way of thinking. It is possible that at the beginning the communication was not very fluid and/or there was a barrier between you. Communication is deep, serious and they will be able to find solutions to problems more easily. You will both enjoy talking about long-term plans with the other. They will trust each other a lot, being reserved and cautious with what they trust each other. Communication can be constant and they will strive to be clear and direct with each other. They will be reasonable and will go to the other before making a decision that has to do with the relationship. Mutual respect and both can consider the other very intelligent and capable.

══🩶Saturn in the 4th house🩶══

This couple focuses on creating something lasting and meaningful and they will give their best and strive to make the foundations a strong and reliable bond. They both work together to make this bond deeper and more emotional, even if they come from different backgrounds. They will be a strong emotional support for the other and will be there for the other in their vulnerable moments, being a pillar of strength and reliance. It may be difficult for you to open up emotionally or talk about very private things, but you will gradually build your trust, which you will give to each other after demonstrations through actions. Creating a home will be something that both take very seriously, often in the conventional way [children, shared house and marriage]. In this relationship they take each other's needs seriously and will seek to meet them.

══🩶Saturn in the 5th house🩶══

Both share a more realistic vision of love, they will always find themselves constantly working on fulfilling their part in the relationship. They will prefer to show affection privately and keep many aspects of their relationship to themselves. You will take your time to plan dates and other activities together. There may be some shyness on one or both partners when it comes to showing love due to fear of betrayal or being perceived as too intense. In this relationship, both are very dedicated and devoted, and they would prefer things to happen at their own pace without the need to force things. With the other they will know a more stable and lasting concept of love in which adversity does not matter, the affection for the other will lead them to try and adapt.

══🩶Saturn in the 6th house🩶══

In this relationship both can help the other to bring greater discipline in the other's life. There is a strong orientation to do things correctly with respect to the relationship, that is, to be devoted, honest and respect the integrity of the other. Both can be people who are very prone to stress and have somewhat workaholic attitudes, but that is where they can support each other so that one party does not have all the burdens. They may have issues opening up to the idea of being helped, but with patience it can be overcome. Both will seek to fulfill their responsibilities in the relationship. For them it is crucial to feel that they contribute to their partner's life, that they contribute something useful and good, they have the idea of supporting each other and being, more than anything, a team that empowers each other.

══🩶Saturn in the 7th house🩶══

The commitment that you feel for this relationship and both of you is really great, you see the other as a great match, as a person with whom you see yourself settling down and someone who not only shares values with you regarding relationships, but who you know would put all of themselves to fulfill the responsibilities that this entails. You both may face challenges in your relationship, but these can also strengthen your bond over time. They are reliable, stable and very understanding of each other, which favors coexistence. Both will take the relationship very seriously and, although they may be very cautious when opening up to each other, as time progresses, trust will be built. Both of them can be very independent people in their daily lives, but they know that they can rely on each other.

══🩶Saturn in the 8th house🩶══

It is very likely that both of them carry certain trust issues, so in this relationship they will take very seriously the task of reassuring their partner and constantly showing the necessary loyalty, trust and transparency. You can both help each other work through their insecurities, which will help you grow a lot together. There may be a need to work together to overcome fears or inhibitions in the area of intimacy in its different senses. They will provide each other with strength and stability in times of crisis, supporting each other to create and start over even if they doubt or fear. They will not mind knowing each other's hidden sides, in fact, they will seek to do so in order to understand and love them better. They will not want the other to deal with all their problems alone

══🩶Saturn in the 9th house🩶══

They can bring more realism to the other's way of seeing life, they will bring structure to their aspirations and dreams and they will help each other keep their feet firmly on the ground. They will begin to take seriously many things that were previously unimportant or seen as superficial. You will get to know deeper sides of each other and there can be great spiritual growth in each other. This couple will work hard to have a greater understanding of each other, to understand them deeply and to share mutually meaningful things. Both will feel a great purpose regarding the relationship, seeing it as something fruitful that provides what they expected and wanted in a relationship [whether it is love or friendship]. It is very likely that both will strive to share similar goals and visions, or at least include the other in their owns.

══🩶Saturn in the 10th house🩶══

They both stand out for being very success-oriented people and that is something that anyone can notice. Both may fear failure, including in the relationship, so they will never have problems trying and working to improve the relationship. They both see each other in the long term and the conviction with which they both see themselves as the one may surprise you. The couple can be seen as responsible and reliable, and can be a symbol of companionship and support for others who can see them as a relationship with many chances of success and durability. This positioning can bring significant achievements if the couple works together in a disciplined and focused manner. They will be able to move forward no matter the difficulties they face as a couple, this placement gives them resilience and the willingness to guide the other and be there for them if necessary.

══🩶Saturn in the 11th house🩶══

This couple will plan a lot in the long term and will see their future together seriously, and not boring or monotonous, but they will take their aspirations and desires seriously to build a future alongside each other. Both will help and influence the other to seek out and meet people who will help them progress, as well as get away from those who bring them down. Both can greatly empower each other, helping the other recognize their individual value.They will mutually support each other to materialize everything they want both inside and outside the relationship. They will be a firm support for each other and will go hand in hand after any adversity that comes their way. Both of you can become more responsible, ambitious and selective with the people you surround yourself with after being together.

══🩶Saturn in the 12th house🩶══

You both need a moment alone with each other to recharge your batteries and feel better. They will mutually encourage and accompany each other to face fears and insecurities. Both will have that willingness to make sacrifices for the other, and it will not cost them to give a lot for the other. There is a strong sense of devotion and dedication. Both may have tense visions of love for things that people around them experienced, which will make them somewhat closed at first. This couple will work hard to support and understand each other on a deeper level. They will bring meaningful lessons to each other's lives and teach each other to be more empathetic and understanding. There may be a fear of arguing and making others uncomfortable that may lead them to not be very clear or communicative when there is an issue. Trust will be crucial.

#synastry #astrology #saturn #saturn in synastry #astro observations #astro notes #saturn in the signs #saturn in the houses #synastry chart

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tealvenetianmask · 1 month ago

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If You Act Like You Don't Need Support, People Believe You: Blitz's "Bulletproof" Act

We know pretty well by now how Blitz's outer shell looks and why he built it. He's carrying a whole cargo load of trauma, and he doesn't want to get hurt anymore. So he puts his natural resilience and charisma front and center and channels all negative emotions into being an asshole. No one gets in.

I think we often fall into seeing Blitz's mask as all negative. But one thing I took away from Ghostfuckers though is how much the people in his life actually find security and comfort in that same shell.

Millie:

Based on her backstory, who can blame her? The final sign that made Millie trust/respect Blitz enough to agree to his job offer?

I can blame this partly on imp culture (valuing toughness), but also, Millie says "you're fucking weird," and I think that comes down to how Blitz doesn't look angry or scared even for a moment. He keeps the smile. The charm. "Unbothered."

When M&M give each other most of their attention (understandable), Blitz just pushes his way past their boundaries anyway, seeming to make a game out of it. We see in Ghostfuckers that his jealousy of M&M, his fear that they don't really care for him . . . that becomes part of his trauma reel. But his friends have no way of knowing that.

When he's on a solo mission in Wee-a-boo-boo, Blitz tells Millie in no uncertain terms that he's got this.

So yeah, Millie's truly never seen him SERIOUSLY upset before, even if WE'VE seen him screaming into the abyss (Truth Seekers) and crying himself to sleep (Ozzie's).

Luckily, Millie has the capacity to adjust and offer the support that Blitz needs.

Loona:

I think Loona gets comfort too from Blitz's outer shell. This time, it's not so much that Blitz never shows her that his feelings are hurt. But that he bounces back quickly. That he always ends up fine.

And at an even farther extreme, Loona can literally throw Blitz across the room and have him doting on her again later that day.

There's comfort, especially when you're someone with a temper, in knowing that there's someone who you can't really hurt, who will stick by you no matter how you behave.

But again, in the Ghostfuckers trauma reel, we get a clip that shows us that's not true either.

Like Millie, when Loona sees Blitz at a true emotional low (this time, his guard is lowered by alcohol . . . and perceived rejection from Stolas), she's able to adjust and be supportive.

Stolas:

Was fairly careless with Blitz's emotions in Season 1, until he saw some vulnerability in Ozzie's and immediately started rethinking his approach.

We often talk about Blitz not realizing that Stolas is vulnerable, but the opposite is also true.

I'm thinking about the flirtatious classism, the teasing, the initial idea that the book deal would be fun and sexy. I think it stems, at least in part, from the idea that Blitz is amazing, that his spirit is kind of unbreakable.

Which again, is not true. His optimism and resilience are wonderful, but he can be hurt (intentional reference to Blitz realizing the same about Stolas).

After the debacle that is Ozzie's, after Stolas sees Blitz in pain from the treatment he received and unable to believe that Stolas's romantic interest in him is genuine, he understands much more. He immediately starts trying to undo the deal, and later in that process, there's this beautiful line . . .

"It's not enough to get through the walls you've conjured up to live."

Stolas isn't there yet by any stretch, in terms of understanding Blitz fully, but even while hurt, there's a part of him that wants to understand, that knows that Blitz is hurting under his mask.

Moxxie:

Ahaha. I bet you thought Stolas would be the twist ending of this meta. NOPE. It's Moxxie. He's the only person close to Blitz who hasn't even begun to adjust to seeing Blitz be vulnerable yet.

Not to psychoanalyze the poor guy, but. His daddy issues are off the fucking charts. Not in a sexual way (though who knows). In a sad way.

Moxxie was raised to follow authority, and the consequence for not doing so was death. Crimson made it very clear. And that's horrible, obviously, but also, there's a certain level of comfort in having everything decided for you.

In having someone who's "got this" in charge. Cult survivors often recall feeling this way.

And I'm not saying Moxxie wasn't incredibly relieved to be rid of Crimson or that he was happy under his control in any way.

But he likes that Blitz is confident, unbothered, and takes care of his team.

I'm done looking for exact lines and screenshots because I have a dinner to get to, but Moxxie does ask in his Truth Seekers hallucination why Blitz pushes his friends away. But he never gets a clear answer, never sees beyond the symbolic mask that Blitz wears there.

And in Unhappy Campers and in Ghostfuckers, we really see him crumble without Blitz's confident leadership. Millie, letting Moxxie take charge and having her own needs that have to be met . . . isn't really enough.

And this is a problem.

Moxx needs to learn some confidence because the unshakeable Blitz he follows . . . doesn't really exist. So I'm interested in seeing how this develops in upcoming seasons.

#my helluva meta #blitz #blitzo #blitzo buckzo #stolas #stolas goetia #stolitz #M&M #Millie #Moxxie #Loona #I.M.P.#this is a reckless twisty and turny one guys

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seungminsbaldspot · 4 months ago

Text

Six Years, Five months and Two days | FIVE X READER

pairing: five hargreaves x reader

Word Count: 3805

Genre: angst

General Notes: Lila x Five did happen here folks :/, sexual themes, crude language, this does not correlate with whatever happens during seasons 4 other than Lila and Five jumping into a different timeline together for seven years, Reader is referred to as female and wife

Trigger Warnings: Infidelity and Betrayal: References to an affair and its emotional fallout, Emotional Turmoil: Repeated cycles of using others for support followed by pain, Unwanted Pregnancy: Discussion of a potential pregnancy with uncertain paternity, Conflict and Blame: Arguments and blame related to the affair and its effects,Intense Conversations: Emotional discussions filled with guilt, regret, and frustration, Relationship Breakdown: Decision to take a break from a relationship due to ongoing issues, and Self-Destructive Patterns: Seeking comfort in a way that leads to more distress.

Author’s note: I think if I could give this fic a song, I think it would be 'don't speak - no doubt’

Taglist:(comment if you wanna be added) @fate-posts

Spoiler: All you get is, there will be a part 4

Click here for part four !

Click here for the previous part two!

It's been a few weeks of this cycle: you using Five whenever the loneliness and anger become too much to bear, then pushing him away, crying in the aftermath, and repeating the cycle. Each encounter is a mix of bitterness and need, a desperate attempt to fill the void left by his betrayal while simultaneously punishing him for it.

Every time, you find solace in his presence, yet the relief is fleeting. The passion you once shared has become a battleground, where your emotions clash and your pain is laid bare. Afterward, as you watch him leave, you are left with a profound sense of emptiness, the tears you shed a stark reminder of the unresolved hurt that still lingers.

Even though this cycle is far from ideal for either of you, it has provided a certain measure of relief. Diego and Lila seem to be finding their way back to happiness, and as for you and Five—well, you’re not divorced, but it's hard to say if what you share can still be called a marriage.

It’s more of a fuck-buddy system now, with you being the only one reaching out. You start to wonder if Five ever gets tired of this arrangement. A flicker of sympathy for him crosses your mind, but it quickly fades when you remember the betrayal. He cheated on you—with his brother’s wife.

A knock on your bedroom door reels your out of your thoughts.

You open the bedroom door to find Lila standing there, her expression a mix of concern and resolve. She’s dressed casually, but there’s a seriousness in her posture that catches your attention.

“Hey,” she begins, her voice tentative but steady. “I was wondering if we could talk.” You nod, stepping aside to let her in. She walks into the room, glancing around as if taking in the remnants of your own turmoil. You close the door behind her, feeling a mixture of curiosity and apprehension.

Lila takes a seat on the edge of your bed, her eyes meeting yours with a searching look. “I know things have been... complicated between us,” she starts, her voice gentle. “And I know that everything with Diego and Five has been tough on you. But I think it’s time we had an honest conversation.”

You sit down across from her, your mind racing with the possible reasons for her visit. Her sincerity and the weight of her words prompt you to brace yourself for what’s to come.

“First off, I want to say I’m sorry,” Lila begins, her voice trembling slightly. “I’m sorry for allowing what happened to happen.”You throw your hand up, shaking your head in frustration. “It takes two to tango, Lila. It wasn’t just you. It wasn’t just him.”

She nods, her eyes reflecting a mix of guilt and regret. “I know, but still…” She trails off, lost in thought for a moment. After a deep breath, she looks at you with a conflicted expression. “I’m not sure if telling you this is going to be a good idea.”

Your eyebrows furrow, curiosity and concern mingling in your gaze. “What do you mean? If there’s something you need to say, just say it.”

Lila hesitates, her eyes darting away, and then finally meets your gaze again. “I think I’m pregnant.”

The words hang heavy in the air between you, each syllable carrying the weight of a thousand unspoken fears and uncertainties. You stare at her, your mind racing as you try to process what she’s just said. The room feels suddenly smaller, the tension could be cut with a knife .

I—” You start, but no words come out. You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. “Are you sure?” Lila nods, her expression a mix of fear and resignation. “I’ve taken a few tests, and they’ve all been positive. I haven’t told Diego yet. I wasn’t sure how or when to bring it up.”

You run your hand through your hair, sitting in silence and shock. The room feels like it’s closing in around you. “I’m telling you this because I don’t know how far along I am. And there may be a slight chance… that… Five could maybe be the father.”

The weight of her words lands heavily on you, the implications sprawling out in every direction. Your mind races through the possibilities, each one more tangled and complicated than the last.

“Five?” you repeat, trying to grasp the full extent of what she’s saying. “You think… there’s a chance this could be Five’s baby?” Lila’s eyes are filled with a mix of regret and uncertainty. “I don’t know for sure, but I dunno, with the timing of everything, It could be his.”

You sit in stunned silence, struggling to process the revelation. “This is... a lot. I mean, Five and I, we’ve been—”

“Using each other,” Lila finishes for you, her voice barely a whisper. You sigh, your shoulders slumping under the weight of the revelation. “This—this is a lot, Lila. I don’t even know what to say,” you admit, feeling utterly defeated.

She nods, her eyes reflecting her own fear and regret. “I know... I’m sorry. I just wanted to be honest. I’m terrified of what this means for Diego and me, and for you and Five.”

You shake your head, trying to wrap your mind around the enormity of what Lila just shared. “I’m not sure why you’re telling me this, Lila.” Your voice is steadier than you feel, masking the chaos that’s erupting inside of you.

Lila takes a deep breath, her hands twisting in her lap. “Because you deserved to know the truth. I thought... maybe if we’re honest with each other, we can figure out what to do next.” Her voice wavers, but there's a glimmer of determination in her eyes.

You let out a bitter laugh, the sound escaping before you can stop it. “And what exactly is there to figure out, Lila? We wait. We wait for this child to grow enough to get a paternity test, and then we deal with whatever the hell happens afterwards.”

Lila flinches at the harshness of your words, her expression a mix of guilt and resolve. “I know it’s not that simple,” she says quietly, her voice barely above a whisper. “But what else can we do? I just wanted to be honest with you, to try and make things right somehow. I don’t want any more secrets between us.”

You shake your head, feeling a wave of exhaustion wash over you. “You think being honest makes up for any of this? You think it undoes the fact that you two fucked?” Your words come out sharper than you intended, the anger being unable to be contained.

Lila's face crumples, her eyes welling up with tears as she looks down, unable to meet your gaze. “No,” she admits, her voice trembling. “I know it doesn’t make up for it. I know it won’t change what happened. But I can’t keep pretending like it didn’t happen, either. I’m trying to face it, to deal with it... even if it means facing you like this.”

You let out a frustrated sigh, running a hand through your hair as you try to keep your emotions in check. “You want to face it? Fine. But I can’t pretend this makes us friends or whatever. You broke something—something that can’t just be fixed with a sorry and some honesty.”

Lila nods, a tear slipping down her cheek. “I know. I’m not asking for forgiveness... I’m not even sure I deserve it. I just wanted to be truthful, to at least try and do the right thing for once.”

You look at her, seeing the raw emotion in her eyes, the genuine remorse etched across her face. For a moment, your anger softens, replaced by a heavy, painful understanding. She’s just trying to figure everything out too, struggling to navigate the chaos and consequences of her actions, just like you. But it doesn’t erase the fact that she played a big part in all of this, that her choices have led to this mess that now binds all of you together.

Still, there’s a part of you that wants to hold onto the anger, to use it as a shield against the hurt and betrayal. Yet, seeing her like this, vulnerable and regretful, you can’t help but feel a flicker of empathy. Maybe she doesn’t deserve forgiveness, but neither of you deserve this situation either.

You exhale slowly, trying to push away the conflicting emotions that swirl inside you. “Look, Lila,” you say, your voice more steady now, “I get that you’re trying to do the right thing. And I get that you’re scared. Hell, I am too. But I can’t just pretend like everything’s okay because you decided to come clean.”

Lila nods again, swallowing hard. “I know,” she whispers. “I don’t expect things to be okay. I just… I need you to know the truth. I thought it was the least I could do.”

You let out another sigh, feeling the weight of her words settle over you like a heavy blanket. “Yeah…” you murmur, trailing off as the enormity of the situation sinks in. Lila takes a deep breath, her gaze shifting nervously before she speaks again. “Do you think you could... tell Five for me?”

Your eyes widen in disbelief. “Why in the hell would I do that?” you snap, unable to hide your frustration.

Lila bites her lip, her eyes filled with a mix of desperation and vulnerability. “Because I’m scared,” she admits softly. “I don’t know how he’s going to react, and I don’t think I can handle another confrontation right now.”

You stare at her in disbelief, anger simmering just beneath the surface. “You’re scared?” you repeat, your voice rising slightly. “Lila, I’m barely holding it together myself. You think I want to be the one to tell him that there’s a chance he might be the father? That’s your issue to deal with.”

She flinches at your words, her shoulders slumping in defeat. “I get it, I do,” she says quietly, her voice trembling. “But I thought... maybe he’d take it better coming from you.”

You shake your head, frustration boiling over. “That’s because I’m his wife, Lila. Or at least, I was before all this happened,” you snap. “But I’m not your messenger, and I’m certainly not going to be the one to clean up your fuck-ups.”

Lila flinches again, your words hitting her like a physical blow. Her eyes brim with fresh tears, but she blinks them back, trying to hold herself together. “I know,” she whispers, her voice barely audible. “I know this is my mess. I just… I thought maybe… since you know him better…”

You cut her off with a sharp shake of your head, your frustration reaching its peak. “Don’t you dare put this shit on me,” you snap, your voice cold and unyielding. “I didn’t cause this mess, and I’m not going to be the one to clean it up for you. You made your choices, Lila. Now you have to deal with them.”

Lila’s face crumples, her composure breaking under the weight of your words. “I’m sorry,” she says again, her voice cracking. “I’m so sorry. I know I’ve hurt you. I know I’ve hurt Diego, and now this… I just don’t know how to fix it.”

You feel a mix of anger and pity as you look at her, sitting there so lost and broken. Part of you wants to scream at her, to make her feel the full weight of the pain she’s caused. But another part of you, a quieter, more compassionate part, recognizes her remorse and the fear in her eyes. She’s struggling, just like you are, caught in a situation that has spiraled out of control.

“Lila,” you say more calmly, though your voice still holds a steely edge, “I’m not the one who can make this right. You need to talk to Diego. You need to talk to Five. You need to deal with this. I can’t do it for you. I won’t.” She nods, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. “You’re right,” she says quietly. “I’ll talk to them. I’ll… I’ll figure it out. I just… I’m sorry.”

There’s a long pause, the silence between you heavy and loaded with unspoken emotions. Finally, you sigh, feeling some of the tension leave your body. “Just… be honest with them,” you say softly. “That’s all you can do now.” Lila nods, her expression a mix of determination and fear. “Thank you,” she says, her voice barely more than a whisper. “For listening. For… for everything.”

Without another word, she turns and leaves the room, the door closing softly behind her. You stand there for a moment, staring at the closed door, feeling a whirlwind of emotions—anger, frustration, sadness, and a tiny, flickering ember of hope. Maybe, somehow, things could start to heal. Maybe, with time, you could all find a way forward. But for now, all you can do is take it one step at a time.

A little while later, another knock breaks the silence, pulling you from the depths of your thoughts. You’ve been sitting alone in the quiet room, the weight of everything pressing down on you. You feel drained, the emotional toll of the last conversation still fresh, and the last thing you want is another confrontation.

With a weary sigh, you stand and cross the room to open the door. On the other side, Five stands there, his expression tight with worry. His eyes quickly scan you, taking in your disheveled appearance and the exhaustion etched across your face.

"Hey," he says, his voice unsteady but low. He looks you up and down again, as if searching for some clue to your state of mind. You sigh, “What hell do you want?” He sighs, running his hand through his hair, “Lila told me.”

You stand there, feeling the weight of his words. “She told you?” you echo, trying to keep your voice steady. Five nods, his face a mixture of concern and frustration. “Can I come in?” he asks quietly.

You sigh, stepping aside to let him in. As he crosses the threshold, you can’t help but feel a lingering, complicated affection for him, despite everything that’s happened.

He takes a seat on the edge of the bed, and you sit down beside him, the space between you feeling both intimate and charged with unresolved tension. Five runs a hand through his hair, his eyes meeting yours with a pained expression. “I have no fucking idea what to do,” he admits, his voice heavy with frustration.

You stifle a laugh, the sound coming out more like a bitter chuckle. “Welcome to the fucking club,” you reply, your tone laced with a mix of sarcasm and resignation. The absurdity of the situation is almost too much to bear, and yet, there’s a part of you that appreciates his honesty and vulnerability.

Five’s expression softens slightly, a glimmer of understanding in his eyes. “So what now?” he asks, his voice quieter. You chuckle again, “Who’s ‘we,’ Five? Last time I checked, it only takes two to make a baby,” you reply, your tone reflecting the harsh reality of the situation. The words hang between you.

Five looks down, clearly grappling with the weight of your words. “I know,” he says quietly, his voice heavy. “I just... What if it is mine?”

You shrug, the gesture feeling as heavy as the conversation. “Then you’d be the father,” you reply coldly. Your tone is blunt, a reflection of the emotional exhaustion you’re feeling—tired of crying, tired of being upset.

He groans, “No fucking shit. What the fuck am I supposed to do? What are we going to do?” He gestures between the two of you, his frustration clear.

You take a deep breath, trying to keep your own emotions in check. “Look, Five,” you begin, your voice firm but weary, “The only thing you, Lila, and Diego can do is wait. Wait for the baby to be old enough to take a paternity test.

He sighs but nods, “Sorry for getting angry at you.” You shrug. unsure of what to say. At this point, words seem inadequate. The situation is so far beyond simple apologies and explanations. You just nod, acknowledging his apology without feeling the need to respond.

The silence that follows is heavy, charged with the weight of your shared pain. Five’s eyes linger on your face, his concern cutting through the tension. “Are you okay?” he asks softly, his voice betraying a genuine worry despite the strained circumstances.

You almost laugh, the irony and frustration bubbling to the surface. “Yeah, I’ve been so fucking good,” you say, your voice dripping with sarcasm. “Since the day I learned my husband cheated on me with his brother’s wife, and now that said wife might be carrying said husband’s baby.” You let out a humorless chuckle, shaking your head. “Everything’s just perfect.”

Five's face tightens with guilt and sorrow as he processes your words. “I’m really sorry,” he says quietly, his voice filled with regret. “I never wanted any of this to happen. I know that’s not enough, but I’m trying— Fuck, I’m trying so fucking hard to make you forgive me.” He runs a hand through his hair, frustration evident in his movements.

You open your mouth to respond, but he cuts you off, his voice rough and strained. “I’m trying, alright? I’m here, doing whatever fucked-up shit you need me to do. I thought maybe I could help in some way, even if it’s just by being here for you. But it feels like nothing I do is right. I don’t know how to fix this or if I even can. I’m just fucking lost.”

He pauses, his eyes searching yours for any sign of redemption or understanding. The frustration and self-loathing in his voice are palpable. You can see the weight of his guilt and regret hanging heavy on him, his attempts to fix things feeling futile and exhausting.

You look away from his intense gaze, the depth of his pain hitting you hard. “I just really fucking love you, alright?” he says, his voice cracking with raw emotion. He reaches out, gently cupping your cheek and turning your face towards him. The touch is tender, almost desperate, as if he's trying to hold on to the last remnants of what you once shared. His eyes, filled with a mix of hope and anguish, search yours for some sign that his words have made a difference.

You feel the warmth of his hand against your skin, the contact both comforting and excruciatingly painful. The depth of his plea and the sincerity in his touch make your heart ache, caught between the love you still feel and the hurt that's been inflicted. His gaze is unwavering, his desperation to mend what’s broken evident in the way he holds your face, as if afraid that if he lets go, he’ll lose you completely.

You sigh, your eyes closing briefly as you gather your thoughts. Slowly, you grasp his wrist and pull it away, creating a necessary distance between you. “Five,” you begin, your voice weary but resolute, “I can’t keep doing this. This is too fucking painful.”

He looks at you, confusion and hurt mixing in his eyes. “What are you saying?” he asks, his voice trembling slightly.

You take a deep breath, trying to find the right words amidst the storm of emotions. “I think we need to take a break," you say, your voice quiet but firm. "This situation... it's too complicated, too messy. We both need time to figure things out, especially with everything that's happening with Lila." You pause, meeting Five's gaze, "I can't keep letting myself be hurt by you."

His expression shifts, a mix of shock and sadness settling in. “A break?” he repeats, his voice barely audible. You nod, your resolve firm despite the emotional weight of the moment. “Yes, a break.” You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself.

He looks at you, confusion and hurt mingling in his eyes. “We’ve never done anything like this before…” he states, his voice trailing off as he searches your face for some hint of a different solution.

You nod, unable to meet his gaze. It hurts, it hurts really fucking bad. You love this man—or loved him? You aren’t too sure anymore. You’ve been through so much together, and the thought of putting distance between you feels like a stab to the heart.

You finally look up, your voice breaking with raw emotion. “I think it’s— it’s for the best.”

You can see the pain in Five's eyes, the way his shoulders slump at your words. He takes a shaky breath, his voice cracking as he struggles to hold back tears. “If that’s what you need...” he begins, but his words trail off, unable to complete the thought. The weight of your decision hangs heavily in the air between you.

You look away, unable to bear the sight of him in such distress—the man you love - broken by your own choices. It’s a painful reminder of the betrayal that brought you to this point, and your heart aches even as you try to stay firm.

Five sighs deeply, gathering himself as he rises from the bed. He walks slowly toward the door, each step heavy with resignation. “I guess I’ll keep you updated on anything that happens with Lila and the baby,” he says, his voice a whisper, almost like he’s trying to convince himself as much as you.

You nod, the gesture feeling hollow as you wave him off. “Yeah, okay,” you reply, your tone subdued. As he exits, the door clicks shut behind him, leaving you alone in the quiet room.

#the umbrella academy season 4 #tua five #tua season 4 #tua s4 #tua #five hargreaves x reader #five hargreeves #five x reader #number five #hargreeves siblings #brisket five #sbs posting #tua fanfic #tua fandom #five x lila #five x y/n #five x you #five hargreaves x you

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theealbatross · 6 months ago

Text

a habit to kick, an age old curse (s.s)

Plot | They're no longer friends unfortunately they're still soulmates.

or, you and Sebastian are now strangers but at your most vulnerable moment he picks up the pieces. Only he knows. Only he can.

Tags | angst, heartbreak, when you're too depressed to confess, sebastian and the bad bitch he pulled by being stupid, sebastian is an academic weapon if he wants to, mentions of fire torture, murder (self-defense), trauma, emotional cheating (if u squint), slight fluff as a treat, panic attack, PTSD, Anne is dead, 3k-ish of angst

[A/N: Stream 'i love you, i'm sorry' by gracie for full immersion.]

Quidditch Season was important for every student in Hogwarts but it was the after-parties that everyone was truly looking forward to, house pride aside.

Which is what exactly Garreth had been barred from. “I can’t believe I wasn’t given an invitation just cause I’m friends with you! I’m not even a Slytherin! And I make the best punches!”

Sebastian rolled his eyes, sighing. Even he didn’t think those pesky Ravenclaws would take their competition this seriously. It all started when he had finally decided to become an auror, after a peaceful, distraction-free year and careful deliberations from each of his professors, he was given the informal encouragement that he was one of the few students who had the potential to become a trainee to such a prestigious program. With his ever-growing physique and indisputable intellect, it would simply be a question of effort.

He just needed to be at the top of all the classes required of him. This was the tragic news for all those Ravenclaw dreams – once Sebastian had his sights on it, it was as good as his.

He hadn’t expected that their ire of him extended to his friends. Even refusing to invite them to the first party of the year that the Ravenclaw had won against the Hufflepuffs. Sebastian had half the mind to join his own House’s quidditch team even with his packed schedule just so he could wipe the floor with them. It would be worth never sleeping again.

“What do you want me to do Gar –”

“Here.”

A piece of paper hung from above him, the hand it was hanging from was connected to a face he hadn’t seen this closely in a long, long time. Even the whisper of her name in his mouth felt foreign – a tragic circumstance when a lifetime ago she had been a kindred soul.

Before he could say anything else, Garreth had already snatched the paper from in-between his eyes. “Is this – Really?!”

“The password for today’s party, try to sneak in when the ‘guards’ are smashed,” she grinned at the redhead. Then, Sebastian felt a cold blade slice through his chest (a hand suspiciously touching the spot just to check) when she looked back down at him again. “For old time’s sake.”

It took him a moment too long to realize she was talking to him too. But his tongue felt heavy and stuck, the metaphorical rug under his feet getting pulled out when he least expected it.

He nodded.

“See you around.”

He stared as she waltzes gracefully from the bustling crowd, getting roped into a hug by her boyfriend, William Frey, the bloody captain of the Ravenclaws. When he had heard about it, he couldn’t quite point out why he hated his smug, pretty face but then, using his blessed brain he got his bitter answer: they were too damn perfect together.

He was everything she deserved.

Smart, popular, kind, and comes from a good family that will be able to support her in whatever endeavors she might be up to in the future.

Not an orphaned criminal who couldn’t even save her sister.

The state of their friendship – or lack thereof – was pitiful but he knew it was for the better. Without each other in the way she can be loved by all those around her – something he has never been able to offer with his murky history that left a rubble of a man. And without her he can forget about his failures and mistakes, distract himself with as much schoolwork as he can cram in his head and never remember the times he sacrificed their friendship for his own gain only to lose it all anyways.

If he doesn’t see her then he can forget – he failed and his twin sister is dead.

A brilliant witch with a brilliant future didn’t deserve to be associated with failures.

“That was tense,” William whispered in your ears as he led you towards the courtyard. “A friend of yours?”

A flash of the lives you’ve lived with the Slytherin flashed before your eyes. Friends, what a lowly name.

You faked a smile, fighting every urge in your body to look back.

“A long time ago.”

The party was loud, no doubt the quidditch players were milking any taste of victory they have before they deal with whoever wins between the Slytherins and Gryffindor’s next week.

The music was loud, nearly pounding through the silencing charms in the walls of the common room. William at the thick in all of it, celebrating with his teammates, not forgetting to wave at you in your seat with that charming smile that usually makes you swoon.

However, it was the charmed fireworks all over the ceiling that had your heart exploding out of your chest. Flashes of nightmares at every pop.

The dark forest, the ruined castle, the ropes in your stretched out hands as Rookwoods men threw all sort of fiery spells at you as target practice.

You pinched your eyes shut, shaking your head, trying to focus on breathing.

When you were starting to get dizzy you knew it wasn’t working. You tried to push through the crowd, reach your boyfriend somehow and at least let him know what was going on but it was impossible. It was the peak of the party when everyone was too drunk to do anything but drink more and dance more. With a shuddering breath, you instead skirted around the crowd and escaped narrowly through the doors of the Ravenclaw common room.

Not even bothering with a disillusionment spell, knowing damn well all the prefects would be in the party, you ran to the nearest floo to travel to your common room.

However, even the silence and comfort of the top of the common room wasn’t enough to ground you as you stumbled straight down the cold tiles, a yelp escaping your mouth from the sting of your skin.

“Someone there?”

That voice, distant but familiar. Painfully familiar. Your eyes continue to blur as your breath hastened, your limbs too weak, and the cold floor too damn comfortable for your overheating body.

“Are you alright?” He’s closer now, at the bottom of the stairs.

No, no, no.

In your desperation, you swallowed your pride. Forgetting in the moment how humiliated you will be to be seen by the last person in your house you wanted to show this side of you.

He would take care of you.

He always takes care of you.

“Sebastian,” you could barely croak out in between your gasps. Silence followed and you whimpered, crawling down to the edge of the top of the stairs when you heard fast footsteps ascending and there he was.

“Fucking hell, what happened to you?!”

Before you could try to say anything else you were already carried in his arms, Sebastian’s panic at seeing someone that was always so shiny and untouchable on a daily basis gasping and writhing in their common room floor was something he had not prepared himself to see tonight.

He thought the worst would be drunk seniors he would have to haul up their rooms not his … not you.

Carefully, he placed you on the nearest couch, your grip in his arms painful but welcome as it grounded him and prevented him from rattling when he saw your pale face covered with sweat and tears.

“Pet, you gotta help me here, what’s going on?! What do you need?!”

His eyes plotted your face, firm hands frantically running across your body to check for any stain of blood or hints of the source of your pain. It was agonizingly intimate, especially with the knowledge of how much this has happened in the past – one of you writhing in pain, the other doing their darndest to fix it.

A shot of pain pierced your chest when you suddenly breathed in, making you cry out and crawl into his arms.

Your calming medicine – it was in your bedside table. However, it was no use, like blood was not reaching your brain and all you know to do is to just hold on to Sebastian.

“Fuck!”

In a blink, your face was buried in Sebastian’s neck, the entirety of your curled up body tightly held together by him as he sat you in his lap, arms wrapped protectively around your body. “Breathe with me,” he whispers, taking deep slow puffs and caressing your hair. “That’s it, deep breathes. Follow me, darling. Enough with your crying now, listen to my voice.”

In. Out. The clean scent of the common room, faint sweet smell of his favorite tea.

In. Out. The sweat on his skin, the cologne he had worn since the first day you met him.

In. Out. Old books, fresh parchment, thick ink, and the throbbing aroma of the Amortentia you brewed last week.

“Hey,” you could feel the sweat start to cool your skin, his rough hand worked on your cheeks as he continued to cradle you in his arms. His body relaxing with yours until you could take up air on your own. “What hap –”

“What in Merlin’s … did you do this?”

You stared up in wonder, the two of you surrounded by a large bubble, the ones you usually see when you throw a Protego, except this one continued to enclose you. Now that your panic has passed you realize you can’t hear anything else but … the sound of water?

He looked shy, rubbing the back of his neck as he settled you back on the couch. It was only then you realized that you had been in his lap this entire time. You hoped the dim light of the common room hid the embarrassment in your face. “It’s … something I’ve made. Helps me sleep at night. What you’re hearing is the sounds under the Black Lake. I’m gonna write a paper on it for Ronen, should get me a couple of points.”

Ah, his valiant academic conflict with the Ravenclaws did not escape even you. They’re going to fucking curse him in their sleep when they realize he was a lap ahead of his competition.

Now that your vision wasn’t doubling you could faintly see a golden string that connected from the bubble, straight through the tall glass window of the common room. “Sebastian, this is brilliant.”

A flare of nervousness lodged in your chest when Sebastian suddenly looked at you– the gaze that let you know that he could see right through you. He always saw right through you – you’d grown to hate it.

“We don’t have to talk about it.”

He was a gentleman – always had been. It could be the fact that he had (has? is it too soon?) a sister that he was so well-versed in the heart of a lady. But aside from that – Sebastian, at some point in time, was someone who knew the most. And the gods’ honest truth is you never could hide a secret from him.

It could be the alcohol in your system or the buried instinctive nature to tell him everything back when the two of you spent late nights in the Room of Requirement and talked about everything being unearthed but you felt like being honest. Even if the boy beside you had grown into a stranger.

“I’m … remember when I got kidnapped by … and you …”

And you saved me.

Again. Always.

He was there, charging headfirst, ignoring Professor Fig’s warnings and Ominis’ pleas to wait for the Aurors in Hogsmeade. When he arrived, he saw the burn marks, bruises, and wounds all over your body and just saw red … and left red.

“The Rookwood incident?”

By the time back up had arrived the two of you were slumped on each other and surrounded by corpses, eyes blank and suspicious, desperately holding on to each other.

“The Rookwood incident,” you nodded. “What I didn’t tell you is that before you had arrived, they had been … they tied me and threw fire spells at me, that’s where I got my wounds. I never told you because –”

He was too angry. And you were too terrified of pushing your closest friend to the darkness he had been tethering on. Not that it mattered, he fell right to that cliff on his own.

“I’m sorry.”

Your eyes widened, hands shaking in front of you. “No, Seb, it’s not like tha –”

“I know you were trying to protect me. You always were,” he shook his head, now it was him who couldn’t look at you. “How many scars did I give you?”

“I healed just fine –”

“Then let me rephrase my question, “ This time, the look in his eyes terrified you. The intensity, the guilt – it was so palpable you almost want to cup his face the way you used to, to ease his cruel burden. “How many of these nightmares have I cursed you with?”

Your silence made his bitter smile grow. You don’t have to say it because he (always) knows – the worst nightmares were the ones with him in it.

“Does … does he know about it?”

You nodded, “He does. William tried to help, sent me to the best mind doctors last summer but … I’m just so tired. I’m tired of the tests, the probing in my brain – he means well, I know he does but there’s nothing those strangers can tell me that I don’t already know.”

With an understanding expression on his face, the two of you sat in silence, staring at the large windows hovering over the two of you as the deep quiet of the lake echoed in the fragile haven he had conjured up. If you close your eyes, if you forget about everything else, you could almost trick you mind that these was one of those good times.

That you’d turn and find him buried in between towers of books you had borrowed from the library and Ominis would be sleeping against the wall of the Undercroft. And then you’d catch his eyes and he would smile – a silent message between two people who didn’t need to speak to communicate – and the silence would stretch, just like this, but you would be together again.

“I could teach you.”

You raised an eyebrow and despite himself he chuckled. He didn’t have the best history with teaching you spells, after all. “This charm, I mean.”

How many cures has been shoved in your throat? How many disappointments you hid in lies that, yes the Calming Elixir cures me of such flaws. Did you need any more help? Would it fix you this time?

“It won’t fix anything but it might ..” he shrugged. “… make tomorrow easier.”

You’re terrified of him, you realize. How can someone know you so deeply without ever even realizing it? Does he know? The power he has over you? How you would’ve burned your life to the ground if he had asked for it?

Ask, you wanted to scream. Ask. Ask. Ask.

“Alright,” He seemed surprised, you smiled at the face he made. “Couldn’t hurt.”

For all his nonchalance it was a complicated charm to cast. “No, it has to be more than half a circle when you swish it –”

This was familiar. A bit more awkward and with a lot more strain but it was familiar – if all had gone well this would have been just an unremarkable day in your life. You can’t help but wonder if your burden would be lighter if he was the one helping you carry it.

You swallowed your thoughts back down, no sense in dreaming of different realities now. Because this was your life and the worst thing that could possibly happen did happen. So, you’ll take all that you can get – even if it’s just one last night pretending everything didn’t slip out of your hands.

“No, here, let me guide you,” When Sebastian was in his ‘professor mode’ as you and Ominis used to tease him for, he gets so focused on teaching that he doesn’t notice anything else, doesn’t even notice your gasp as he wrapped an arm around your back, grasping the hand with your wand and helping you trace the shape needed to cast the spell. “And the word is ‘Salus.”

Salus. Safety. Salvation.

That’s who he was. Your Sebastian. “Salus.”

On cue, a bubble surrounded the two of you once again, the white noise of the castle replaced by the deep lake’s groans. “Perfect.”

Despite the time you spend learning all sorts of complicated magic, it never takes away the quick flutter of your chest in excitement at every spell you master. “I did it!” You turned to be Sebastian but he was already looking at you.

You’ve always told him if you didn’t know any better you would’ve thought Sebastian was the true heir of Slytherin. He just fits here – in the dim lights, and emerald furniture, and the coldness that emphasizes just how warm he is. “… beautiful.”

“What?” He was staring, his hooded gaze, the freckles you had always wanted to trace into constellations, the part on his lips that teases your skin with his breath.

“Your technique is beautiful.” He’s lying, you don’t catch it. Suddenly, your half-pinned hair fell apart, Sebastian having pulled away the clip holding it away from your face. “Now, lay down.”

His arms were gentle and firm as they guided you to lay across the wide couch, Sebastian having scooted down to sit on the floor, face in front of yours. He’s so close. “Sleep.”

You hope he knows, that if your sleep remains dreamless tonight and if your tomorrow is easier, it’s not because of his painfully complicated spell. Your eyes waver, the edges of your sight dimming and blurring. You feel a touch on your cheek, you try to chase it. The last thing you see is his deep brown eyes and the soft smile that had been the biggest curse he had unknowingly laid on you.

He has to know, right?

You have to tell him.

Sebastian, I’ve always – I still – I never stop –

“Hey, wake up.”

Your eyes split open, another ghost of your past in front of you. “Ominis?”

The noise slowly trickled as you became more aware, eyes shifting to you, some out of curiosity why you picked the couch as a resting place instead of your bedroom a few feet away or some that saw you in the party that held some pity, probably thinking you’re suffering the worst hangover of your life.

“William Frey is looking for you by the door,” he muttered sharply. It’s been a while since you and Ominis interacted, his tattered friendship with Sebastian extending to your own as the boy’s most loyal comrade in his pursuit of destruction. You know he lays a blame you and for that you couldn’t blame him. “Honestly, I had thought you had grown out of your foolish habit of sleeping everywhere.”

“I-I’m … sorry?”

He shook his head before turning to leave.

Had … had everything been a dream?

You looked around suspiciously, for what you weren’t quite sure. A sign? A pillow out of place that could be evidence that last night happened?

It wasn’t mere delusion, you were sure. The knowledge of the spell in your head evidence enough of the small moment you shared with an old friend last night but it would be nice to have some sort of proof. A tangible confirmation that you could keep with you as you return to your reality.

With a sigh you let your disappointment fester for a second longer, locking last night in the deepest part of your heart, one that can only be unearthed once again in your loneliest nights.

A practiced smile cements on your face, turning to the chair one last time to allow yourself one more moment of hesitation before going up the stairs.

Back to the beautiful boy who will only see the beautiful parts of you and leaving the one who gets the honor of keeping the shadows.

Inside the boy’s dormitory Sebastian stares at the stolen emerald clip on his bedside table.

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